Can it be used in the proper sense or has the misuse ruined it forever? As in: the cleaning agent also retards growth of bacteria for one week after use.
Arrest, decelerate, impede, hamper, lessen, crimp, restrain, inhibit, hinder...there are so many good words for what you're trying to say, is there really any reason to use one that's used as a dehumanizing slur? I really don't think so. Some disabled people may feel differently, but if you're not disabled yourself, it's usually best to err on the side of caution and not use such words under any context.
There are a number of slurs that had different meanings once, but I think people in general should have a care with using them. Even used in its original context, the r-word tends to make me flinch, and for others like me, it can be even worse.
So I guess what I'm trying to say is, you'd get mixed opinions on that, but you'll find a lot of us appreciate it if you just avoid the r-word altogether.
TRIGGER WARNING: I use a few ableist slurs in this comment to get my point across.
@Moonlight
Almost every slur began as a utilitarian word. The n-word originates in Spanish as the word for black. It's how it's been used that created the hurtful, and oppressive qualities. While I get why you want to be able to continue to use it in a utilitarian form when you do so you are valuing your own desire to use a word over the dignity of those whom it actively hurts and oppresses.
This is especially so when people insist on using the r-word in reference to something that is "slow" or "halted." Why? Because many people ignorantly believe that those words also apply to people who's brain function differently than what is considered "typical" or "normal" in our culture. This meaning is at the root of how the r-word is used as a slur. People use it to characterize behavior considers so woefully inappropriate that it is implied they must lack the intellectual capacity to know right from wrong.
Trying to downplay the offensiveness of the word by citing it's origins as a scientific term, doesn't erase how its meaning is applied in a judgmental and bigoted way to other people. The word is used to classify someone as lesser by implying they are not smart. Whether this application results in condemnation or pity it's still offensive.
Think about the narratives that often characterize people with Autism or mental illness. Notice how often it's about how their brains are "damaged" or "inferior." The r-word is part of this distorted bigoted narrative that classifies anyone who doesn't think or behave like our culture thinks they should as bad, lesser, or even dangerous.
Think I'm exaggerating? Think how often people use words like "crazy, insane, and even the r-word" to describe people who do dangerous, unacceptable, or horrific things. How do you think it affects Autistic people or people with mental illness to constantly see people characterize criminals and abusers with words that are also used against them? What message does that send?
But beyond all this is it really such a terrible hardship to use a different word? Obviously if your writing a scientific paper, the context is inherently not a slur, however if you talking IRL, or on social media is it really too much to ask to say arrested instead of the r-word?
Is your need to use one word more important than the dignity of another human being?
You know what, Moonlight Reader? YOU go the hell. Get the fuck off my post. *I* am autistic. Me. Not my son or my brother or whatever, ME. I made a post specifically about how this slur is not okay to use, because it harms me and people like me. Parents do things like throw their autistic children off bridges because of this sort of dehumanization.
And what do you do? Instead of shutting your fucking mouth and listening to the people this bigotry affects, you're all "oh, but can't I use it this way?" No, no you fucking can't. And I say these things because I know what it's actually like to be autistic.I know every pain and insult your son will ever face in his life. I have been bullied to the point of self-harm and nervous breakdown because of my autism, and I'm still standing, and it's not because of people like YOU.
Having an autistic son does NOT give you the right to speak for him or any other autistic person. It does not give you a right to EVER speak over an autistic person who is speaking out about slurs used against them. I tried being nice in my initial response, but I am DONE with the disgusting ignorance of autism parents. If you don't already know why you should never use the r-word, you deserved every last word of that lecture, and you had no right to tell Fangirl off for giving it to you. Especially since she was far nicer to you about it than you deserved.
Go Google 'murdered autistic children'. Google London McCabe and Issy Stapleton. Read all the articles that rush to excuse parents of MURDER because their child was autistic, boo hoo, poor them. Read Time's report on how nearly 50% of autistic children are bullied, where they admit right in the article that they're positive that number is low. Read about how 90% of all people with developmental disabilities will be sexually abused. Read about how people with developmental disorders and mental illnesses are far more likely to be the victims of violent crime rather than commit them, and yet every time someone commits a violent crime they're dismissed as "crazy". Google Autistics Speaking Day and read what WE have to say about being us.
Now, you can play the "you're not like my son" bullshit which I've heard a million times, and I'll consign you to the steaming pile of shitty parents who will inevitably harm their autistic children. Or you can do the research I mentioned, and maybe one day, when your son comes to you to ask why people like him are murdered simply for being autistic, you won't have to tell him it's because privileged shits like you are determined to keep using harmful slurs.
Whatever else you do, DO NOT bring your ignorance back onto my post and try to drown out my ACTUALLY autistic voice ever again. I am DONE with this shit, absolutely 100% done. Do NOT come back here unless what you have to say is an apology, seriously don't, because if you think I'm angry now, you haven't seen anything yet.
I didn't say anything about your post, Kaia. You were perfectly respectful, not condescending and I appreciated your response.
I am just sick and tired of being condescended to by Jeanne.
But, sure, I'll get the hell off your post. No problem.
Edited:
I apologize. I can understand why you thought my post was aimed at you, and that is absolutely my bad. It wasn't. I should have been more clear. I completely appreciated your initial response, and was convinced by your perspective.
Don't you dare try to cred check my authority. Both my sons are autistic and I have a neurological disability of my own, which is why I took the time to try to explain why using the r-word is such a problem.
You want to keep using the r-word FINE! But don't try to tone police me, by mischaracterize my careful explanation as me being "condescending." Own your own defensiveness and stop trying to frame yourself as a victim in a situation that isn't about you at all.
There are a number of slurs that had different meanings once, but I think people in general should have a care with using them. Even used in its original context, the r-word tends to make me flinch, and for others like me, it can be even worse.
So I guess what I'm trying to say is, you'd get mixed opinions on that, but you'll find a lot of us appreciate it if you just avoid the r-word altogether.
@Moonlight
Almost every slur began as a utilitarian word. The n-word originates in Spanish as the word for black. It's how it's been used that created the hurtful, and oppressive qualities. While I get why you want to be able to continue to use it in a utilitarian form when you do so you are valuing your own desire to use a word over the dignity of those whom it actively hurts and oppresses.
This is especially so when people insist on using the r-word in reference to something that is "slow" or "halted." Why? Because many people ignorantly believe that those words also apply to people who's brain function differently than what is considered "typical" or "normal" in our culture. This meaning is at the root of how the r-word is used as a slur. People use it to characterize behavior considers so woefully inappropriate that it is implied they must lack the intellectual capacity to know right from wrong.
Trying to downplay the offensiveness of the word by citing it's origins as a scientific term, doesn't erase how its meaning is applied in a judgmental and bigoted way to other people. The word is used to classify someone as lesser by implying they are not smart. Whether this application results in condemnation or pity it's still offensive.
Think about the narratives that often characterize people with Autism or mental illness. Notice how often it's about how their brains are "damaged" or "inferior." The r-word is part of this distorted bigoted narrative that classifies anyone who doesn't think or behave like our culture thinks they should as bad, lesser, or even dangerous.
Think I'm exaggerating? Think how often people use words like "crazy, insane, and even the r-word" to describe people who do dangerous, unacceptable, or horrific things. How do you think it affects Autistic people or people with mental illness to constantly see people characterize criminals and abusers with words that are also used against them? What message does that send?
But beyond all this is it really such a terrible hardship to use a different word? Obviously if your writing a scientific paper, the context is inherently not a slur, however if you talking IRL, or on social media is it really too much to ask to say arrested instead of the r-word?
Is your need to use one word more important than the dignity of another human being?
And what do you do? Instead of shutting your fucking mouth and listening to the people this bigotry affects, you're all "oh, but can't I use it this way?" No, no you fucking can't. And I say these things because I know what it's actually like to be autistic.I know every pain and insult your son will ever face in his life. I have been bullied to the point of self-harm and nervous breakdown because of my autism, and I'm still standing, and it's not because of people like YOU.
Having an autistic son does NOT give you the right to speak for him or any other autistic person. It does not give you a right to EVER speak over an autistic person who is speaking out about slurs used against them. I tried being nice in my initial response, but I am DONE with the disgusting ignorance of autism parents. If you don't already know why you should never use the r-word, you deserved every last word of that lecture, and you had no right to tell Fangirl off for giving it to you. Especially since she was far nicer to you about it than you deserved.
Go Google 'murdered autistic children'. Google London McCabe and Issy Stapleton. Read all the articles that rush to excuse parents of MURDER because their child was autistic, boo hoo, poor them. Read Time's report on how nearly 50% of autistic children are bullied, where they admit right in the article that they're positive that number is low. Read about how 90% of all people with developmental disabilities will be sexually abused. Read about how people with developmental disorders and mental illnesses are far more likely to be the victims of violent crime rather than commit them, and yet every time someone commits a violent crime they're dismissed as "crazy". Google Autistics Speaking Day and read what WE have to say about being us.
Now, you can play the "you're not like my son" bullshit which I've heard a million times, and I'll consign you to the steaming pile of shitty parents who will inevitably harm their autistic children. Or you can do the research I mentioned, and maybe one day, when your son comes to you to ask why people like him are murdered simply for being autistic, you won't have to tell him it's because privileged shits like you are determined to keep using harmful slurs.
Whatever else you do, DO NOT bring your ignorance back onto my post and try to drown out my ACTUALLY autistic voice ever again. I am DONE with this shit, absolutely 100% done. Do NOT come back here unless what you have to say is an apology, seriously don't, because if you think I'm angry now, you haven't seen anything yet.
I am just sick and tired of being condescended to by Jeanne.
But, sure, I'll get the hell off your post. No problem.
Edited:
I apologize. I can understand why you thought my post was aimed at you, and that is absolutely my bad. It wasn't. I should have been more clear. I completely appreciated your initial response, and was convinced by your perspective.
Don't you dare try to cred check my authority. Both my sons are autistic and I have a neurological disability of my own, which is why I took the time to try to explain why using the r-word is such a problem.
You want to keep using the r-word FINE! But don't try to tone police me, by mischaracterize my careful explanation as me being "condescending." Own your own defensiveness and stop trying to frame yourself as a victim in a situation that isn't about you at all.