Comments: 30
Elentarri's Book Blog 3 years ago
Looks like Paolini can give Dickens a run for his money in terms of long-windedness.
Darth Pedant 3 years ago
And then some! I'm lighting another candle for the the audio book narrators.
Emerjas 3 years ago
Wow. That sure is something.
Darth Pedant 3 years ago
It sure is.
Chris' Fish Place 3 years ago
I have questions.
Darth Pedant 3 years ago
Sooooo many questions.
Chris' Fish Place 3 years ago
Like, why doesn't her neck break.
A Voracious Reader 3 years ago
That just gives me all the feels and none of them are good.
Darth Pedant 3 years ago
I'm sorry if I'm bringing up bad memories! XD
A Voracious Reader 3 years ago
I'll survive. lol
3 years ago
Oh. Em. Gee. Wasn't this author very young when he wrote these, or am I thinking of someone else?
A Voracious Reader 3 years ago
He was around 25 at the time of this publication.
3 years ago
Oh, not that young then.
Darth Pedant 3 years ago
He was a teenager when he started writing the series, and in my opinion the writing hasn't improved since book one.
Waitaminute. You actually *transcribed* this monster -- as in, letter by letter -- just to share it here? If I'm in awe of anything, it's that!
Darth Pedant 3 years ago
I thought this colossal sentence that took up most of a page had to be seen in all its dubious majesty to be truly appreciated, and I actually thought transcribing would be quicker than trying to find it online, tedious as it was. My husband came in while I was doing it, and without even looking to see what I was working on he said, "Don't type angry!" XD XD XD
* Snort * I can picture the scene.

Btw, I honestly don't remember whether this monster made it into the abridged audio, but this and the other examples you posted really make me want to see Kerry Shale's notes. "PAUSE. Breathe and count one. ... PAUSE. Breathe and count one. ... PAUSE ..."
Darth Pedant 3 years ago
LOL!
Murder by Death 3 years ago
There should be a new rule: if you can't read a sentence in one breath, without turning blue and passing out, IT'S TOO DAMN LONG.
Elentarri's Book Blog 3 years ago
That's what all the commas and semi colons are for - one breath. Full stop = two breaths. That's what an English teacher told us in high school when we had to do reading out loud.
They all think just because Dickens got away with it a century and a half ago they must be allowed to do that, too.

As my English teacher (who also knew her German lit pretty well) once wrote in a note on an essay of mine: "You don't have to try and copycat Thomas Mann with every other sentence." She added something to the effect that "native speakers wouldn't do that". Had I read Paolini at the time, I'd have pointed her to the above sentence by way of counter-exhibit A. As it was, even my knowledge of Dickens at the time was, alas, limited to screen adaptations of his books ...
Murder by Death 3 years ago
@Elentarri: your English teacher would have found me a complete pain in the ass. That's entirely too slow and if I tried it, I'd have ended up hyperventilating.
Elentarri's Book Blog 3 years ago
It is slow, but she was talking specifically to this one student who couldn't read very well. He kept stuttering and sounding out the words. I'm surprised he managed to get to highschool with almost zero reading ability. This particular English teacher also said she didn't care what we read so long as we read it (this was for a book review, someone wanted to review a comic book) and she didn't care if we had to use a crutch (i.e. finger or ruler under the words) because evertually we would grow out of it if we read enough.
Darth Pedant 3 years ago
If only Paolini had a writing teacher who cared as much as that English teacher.
Elentarri's Book Blog 3 years ago
P.S: I think Paolini was trying to be a smart-ass and since his parents were publishing the books, he got away with it. The editors were also apparently too terrified to tell the boss that the boss' kid has text/verbal diarrhea.
Darth Pedant 3 years ago
I find this scenario entirely believable. It might be naive of me, but I'd like to believe that an editor without that kind of bias would have told the kid to quit tossing all that word salad into the manuscript.
Darth Pedant 3 years ago
Wow. And I thought *I* had a run-on sentence problem. Just . . . wow.
Murder by Death 3 years ago
Dickens must be rolling in his grave... o_O
Darth Pedant 3 years ago
In envy? Calculating how much he could have gotten paid for a sentence that long? XD
Murder by Death 3 years ago
Probably would have fed his kids for a week!