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Search tags: Ill-Have-Some-Plot-with-That-Porn
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review 2017-02-18 17:01
Small Favors: The Definitive Collection - Colleen Coover

Annie's all about some self-love... so much so that a personification of her conscious steps up and assigns her a keeper in the form of the adorable (and just as horny) Nibbil!  Abundant sexy adventures ensue.  The graphic novel beautifully inked, and near the end we get a story in absolutely gorgeous watercolor.

This one came up in NetGalley almost right after I'd talked about sexy comics/graphic novels at Arisia... and man do I wish I had known about this one before the panel.  In itself, the story isn't fantasy where you get magic and elves, but a contemporary setting with just a hint of the fantastic in the form of anthropomorphic representation of a character's inner self.  However, for the other meaning of fantasy... yeah, this book is all that.  Small Favors proudly wears the label of "critically-acclaimed girly porno comic."  It's a fun and creative celebration of sexual fantasy and affection.

Also, it is kind of adorably cheeky.



Advance Reader Copy courtesy of Crown Publishing via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review; changes may exist between galley and the final edition.

Source: libromancersapprentice.blogspot.com/2017/02/book-review-small-favors.html
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text 2017-02-17 16:05
in which i'm vaguely confused
Tangled in Sin: A Bound and Determined Novel - Lavinia Kent

ok, i get that there's various bodily responses to arousal - swelling due to increased blood flow to specific areas of the body, eye dilation (which is what i have to assume is meant whenever they say someone's eyes darken).  hell, if activities that inflict injury are involved (scratching/biting/accidental room destruction/idfk) there can be various swelling.

 

but fondling someone on the body in general (ie. not on genital area) does not make that body part "plump" like a bloody rising dough.

 

also the book needs a second run through by an editor, noticed an instance of "boats" instead of "boots" that made me giggle.

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review 2015-01-10 21:08
[Book Review] Dragon Knight's Medallion
Dragon Knight's Medallion - Mary Morgan

Stephen MacKay and his brothers were once revered Dragon Knights, until the machinations of an evil druid result in the death of the MacKay sister's death, at the hands of her brothers.  Stripped of their relics and cast from favor by the fae, the MacKay brothers are wandering in despair, trying to fill this hole in their very being.  Stephen has tried to find solace from his guilt and rage in the church, donning the habit of a monk.  He knows not of his brother Duncan's redemption, and is plagued by visions of death that bring him disabling pain.

Aileen Kerrigan is no stranger to magic, but there are some things, including time travel, that she believes are pure fantasy.  So when her father reveals a discovery unearthed in a Scottish castle, tied in with the revelation of a vision of Aileen's destiny had by her mother years ago, she is torn between feelings of betrayal and concern for her father's sanity.  Then she stumbles through the veil of time and into the arms of Stephen MacKay, helping him find love and redemption.

Ok.  After finishing this one I'm not really sure why I requested it.  I blame a mixture of curiosity and 3am.  Based on my review of the first book in the series, Dragon Knight's Sword, I apprently found that one alright, so I went into this book expecting something fluffy, a little over the top, but not too bad.

I basically just read 400+ pages of nothing.  It took about as much time and effort as reading your standard 200 page romance novel, and that's not because I eagerly devoured the text.  I wouldn't really classify the book as bad, it just didn't really strike me as much in any way.

What I can say about the story - sex is sudden and explosive, descriptions are a bit overblown, and incredibly one-dimensional stubbornness and emotions.  I get that stubbornness makes for dramatic moments, and individuals don't have the instant clairty to consider a situation from all sides, but I can barely follow much of the thinking.  The sex is plentiful, even in marathons that are hilarious in consideration of the fact that they've been riding on horseback all day for days.  The characters are gorgeous, sexy, and passionate.  There is a dragon, magic, and lots of men in kilts.  There will be several other books in this series.  Read this book for the fantasy setting rather than the historical one.

Advanced Reader Copy copy courtesy of NetGalley; differences may exist between uncorrected galley text and the final edition.

Source: libromancersapprentice.blogspot.com/2015/01/book-review-dragon-knights-medallion.html
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review 2014-12-17 01:20
[Book Review] Revealing Ruby
Revealing Ruby (Novella) (Bound and Determined) - Lavinia Kent

I previously reviewed Mastering the Marquess by Lavinia Kent, so I had a fair idea of what to expect in terms of how hot and heavy the story would get.


Madame Rouge runs a discreet, high-end brothel for customers of discerning tastes and needs.  She takes care of the women in her employ, and tolerates no mistreatment by her patrons.  One of the rules of the brothel is that as its proprietress, she is not on the menu, lest the power dynamic she holds is disrupted.  That doesn't mean Madame Rouge never has interest in the men who come calling at her establishment.  And Captain Derek Price definitely whets her appetite.

The attraction between the two is palpable, but Madame Rogue does not take customers.  However, maybe he's worth being herself with for once.


I will admit, in some ways Revealing Ruby was tamer than I expected.  Mastering the Marquess is full of longing and passionate kinky sex.  Revealing Ruby stays on the vanilla end of the spectrum, but is sensual and still heavy on the longing and naked romping.  Good connection to the larger shared setting, and if you like steamy historical atmosphere, Lavinia Kent does deliver.

I'm not sure if I think the dragon tattoo that Captain Price sports is quite as sexy as it's described.  I love dragons, but the image in my mind is perhaps a bit more comical than erotic.  The ending is not a happily-ever-after, but one of adults working with their obligations.

Advanced Reader Copy copy courtesy of Netgalley; differences may exist between uncorrected galley text and the final edition.

Source: libromancersapprentice.blogspot.com/2014/12/book-review-revealing-ruby.html
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review 2014-12-07 22:00
[Book Review] A SEAL Wolf Christmas
A SEAL Wolf Christmas - Terry Spear

To start off, this is exactly the sort of romance novel (paranormal or not) I'm embarrassed to be caught reading.  I wouldn't have picked this up on my own, and really only did so as it was a book club pick.  If you are into books that have titles like A SEAL in Wolf's Clothing (admit it, you probably read it as "a seal in wolf's clothing" and giggled), A Highland Wolf Christmas (kilts AND werewolves), Call of the Cougar (were-cougars, not older women chasing significantly younger men), Jaguar Fever, and the like, you will probably like this book (and other titles by Terry Spear).

I didn't.  But then, I'm not someone who generally sees a book like this and says "hot damn, I have got to read this."  Exceptions standing for books involving Librarians for amusement reasons and review copies requested at 3AM.  I really can't defend many of my 3AM review choices.

Official teaser text for A SEAL in Wolf's Clothing:

Can an Alpha Wolf Who's Met His Match...

Navy SEAL Bjornolf Jorgenson has had tough missions before, but going undercover with feisty gray wolf Anna Johnson could top the list. She drives him crazy—in more ways than one. Now he has to investigate a murder, supervise a wild teenage wolf—and handle Christmas with Anna.

Survive the Holidays with Her?

For Anna, the only thing worse than staging the perfect family Christmas is having to do it with Bjornolf posing as her husband. Anna is a serious undercover operative who isn't afraid of a fight, even with a hunky SEAL shifter. With a killer on the loose, Anna just wants to focus on their mission, but the one thing she can't fight is her sizzling chemistry with Bjornolf.

Praise for USA Today bestseller A SEAL in Wolf's Clothing:

"A nonstop, action-packed romance with kick, growls, and sexy attitude."—Long and Short Reviews

"A delightful and tantalizing read...You'll be captivated."—Thoughts in Progress

"Edgy characters, lots of loving, and lots of action. Just about as good as it gets!"—The Book Binge

Guess who's not buying it?

Yup.  Me.

Okay.  Starting with "She drives him crazy - in more ways than one."  In this book Anna doesn't drive him crazy in "more ways than one"; his reactions to Anna are fuck and protect.  It's pretty clear cut.  Next, "supervise a wild teenage wolf."  I'm not sure they ever really supervise this kid, they're more there to be there as theoretically positive examples of adult werewolves.  That he requested.  And Nathan's more "earnest" and likely to cause trouble by mistake than actually act out in a "wild" manner.

My take on summarizing this book:


Retired Navy SEAL (because we have to have that in here, obviously) Bjornolf Jorgenson (now that I think of it, I don't think they ever address his rank) is a loner and a ghost.  He specializes in providing unseen security for teams operating in dangerous conditions.  But sometimes, revealing himself is inevitable.

Anna Johnson contracts with Hunter's rescue teams, but isn't part of the pack.  When on a mission in the Amazon to rescue a hostage family, she and Jorgenson end up working closely together, after his quick work saves her life.  Things get a little steamy between the two, and not just because they're in a jungle.

What Anna isn't prepared for is their next assignment.  Hunter wants Anna and Bjornolf to pose as newly wed relations of the teen were Nathan, who's stumbled onto evidence of foul play.  Not comfortable with Christmas or the temptation of shacking up with the sexy Bjornolf, Anna reluctantly accepts the assignment, determined to solve the murders as quickly as possible.  What she doesn't count on is Nathan and Bjornolf changing her mind about the holiday, and about family and relationships.

If I'm reading a book about werewolves I get that we'll have bad-ass alpha males coming to the rescue.  Here's the thing, Anna is supposed to be seriously bad ass.  Maybe not quite as deadly or combat experienced as Bjornolf, but she's been working as an independent security contractor for years.  I want to see her throw down.  Instead we pretty much get "she's a badass woman, look at how badass she is" while Bjornolf runs in to save the day.

Honestly, the book reads more like "here are normal humans who can be hardcore" with a propensity for turning fuzzy, rather than the superhumans they're promised to be.

Maybe I'm just yearning for Elena Michaels.

In this setting it's also made out that if two werewolves bone, they are mated for life (unless one dies, then the other is free to find a new mate).  Okay, so I totally get that relationships between werewolves need to be taken slow, and maybe they have a tendency towards one-night stands with humans whom they can't bond with.  Anna and Bjornolf sure shack up in a permanent relationship fast.

The narration switches from person to person quickly and without much warning.  Just paragraph to paragraph within the same scene.  The prose is weak and under developed.  Everything within the plot is so pat.  The villains are little more than paper dolls.  Hell, the sex wasn't even that hot.  It was just sort of there.  I've read hotter sex scenes in non-romance novels.

I don't see myself reading anything else by this author, her writing just isn't for me.

Source: libromancersapprentice.blogspot.com/2014/12/book-revew-seal-wolf-christmas.html
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