I requested this title from Netgalley thinking it was a horror novel because it was in the horror category. I must be more careful about hitting that request button without doing a little research first.

This book is a comedy about a demon gone rogue because his boss Satan is an unappreciative pain in the bum. Satan sends all of his bounty hunters out to drag the demon’s sorry butt back to Hell. But this is not a horror novel. At least not the first 25%. It is written in the sarcastic spirit of Christopher Moore and Clive Barker’s Mister B. Gone which is a book that did not get along with me and I normally adore Barker so you can see how this going to go, can’t you?

Not well, if you were wondering.

I gave up on this book at the 25% mark not because it wasn’t the horror novel I was expecting (so don’t rag on me about that) but because the characters were all loathsome unlikable creatures and I wasn’t in any kind of mood to deal with them. I am also very particular about my humor. This was vaguely amusing but wasn’t making me laugh or snicker or any of those things it should’ve been doing. It was mostly frustrating me because it is written in the “tell don’t show” mode, the plot was extremely disjointed, the ARC had all kinds of pesky formatting errors and it was not keeping my attention no matter how hard I tried. I think a good pass through an editor could easily fix those things but as is, I couldn’t find the will to continue.

Thank you Netgalley for sending me the ARC. I wish it could’ve been a five star read for me but you can’t win them all. I'm sure there are many out here that will dig the humor but unfortunately I'm not one of them.

The Bride Wore Brains delivers exactly what its title and cover promise. I am easily misled but this time all ended gorily-ever-after and I couldn’t be happier.

Here’s the gist: Bridezilla wants a perfect wedding and is determined to get it no matter who she ticks off. The wedding party spends some time bantering, fighting, smoking pot and ogling each other as they do their best to stay out of the bride’s way. But things go awry when one of the groomsmen starts vomiting out his insides . . . And that’s when the real fun begins! At first most of these people think they’re being pranked but they quickly realize it’s real when their friends start turning an unappealing shade of gray.

People are eaten, secrets are revealed and a few surprising character turn-arounds happen. It was sarcastic, horrifying and a terrific black comedy that is as gory as they get.

I have to admit I was very worried there for a while because the writer spends an enormous amount of time setting the scene and fleshing out the characters, most of who were terrible people. Think frat boys and spoiled cheerleaders. I also could care less about wedding drama.

But the payoff is well worth it. You really start to despise some of these self-centered, obnoxious people and cannot wait for a few of them to get eaten. Or maybe it’s just me having these thoughts?

In the end, the biggest surprise for me was that I ended up not entirely despising a few of the characters who I completely despised in the earlier chapters. The reluctant bridesmaid was the only one I could tolerate early on and she turns out to be not only bitingly sarcastic but smart and resourceful too. Fleshy, one of the groomsmen, is a silly pervert who embraces his ridiculous reputation and inserted some comic relief exactly where it was needed and he wasn’t so bad in the end, after all. I won’t spoil the rest by blabbing on any longer but the amount of characterization is exceptional in this short story.

It’s a short book and well worth reading if you like your horror gory and your humor black. Just stick with it, I promise it gets good once the blood finally starts flowing.

Oh…dear. I…The… cover was pretty?

The blurb sounded awesome. The idea/premise was awesome. The cover promised good things. Good things! ....the book sucked. I tried really, REALLY hard to come up with at least a handful of things I liked about this book. I mean, I wanted to like this book. I really did!

There’s spelling and editing errors (you’re instead of your, missing words, etc - an excess amount even for an ARC), the pacing is ridiculous. It took the main character 4 chapters to… go to the bathroom? Here’s the thing, too, about snark. Snark can be funny. Snark, in small doses, IS funny. However, when basically all your characters/caricatures do IS snark… it falls uncomfortably, awkwardly flat. Aside from snark, funnies, too, are best served in small doses. Not forcefully crammed into every other sentence as if crying “Look at me! Look at me! See how funny I am? Hahahahahaha.”

Every time the writing gets close to being serious for a moment, another supposedly funny remark is crammed in. Its…depressing, actually.

I get it. I do. Its supposed to be a funny/silly take on all the apocalypse stories out there. Its just not. Satire or not, it just falls depressingly, horribly flat. This book desperately needs worked over by a firm editor, and large portions revised before this will even begin to approach what it was meant to be.

There have been many novels about the end of the world, but there’s only been one Apocalypse Cow. Okay, so technically there’s 2 because there’s  a sequel called World War Moo, but still. The beef (and pork? and chicken? Awwww, crap!)  has a, uh, beef it needs to settle with us. Hang on to your britches, folks, this book was moo-stly fun and udder madness! 

This is going to be one of those books that you either love or hate. I absolutely loved it. I’m almost as hard to please with Comedy as I am with Fantasy books, but Apocalypse Cow hit the nail on the head. I did everything from snicker to guffaw, to choke on my food while I was reading.

“But good looks counted for nothing when you smelled of intestines.”

“Colin threw his head back to let out a laugh so loud and brazen in its bum-lickery it resonated through the office window”

 

“Behind wire -rimmed glasses, he had the eyes of a man who would strangle his own mother in order to get his inheritance early. Had Terry met him under different circumstances,he would have assumed he was a banker.”

 

“Let me get this straight. Your plan is to sit here and hope the good vegan vibes you’re sending out will protect us?”

-Michael Logan, Apocalypse Cow

Basically, the government screws up, and this virus gets released. The food chain gets fried. At first its just the cows that are infected, but it soon spreads, and its a rip-roaring read with some shockingly gory and also sad moments acting as a balance to the hilarious zingers Logan casually tosses about during the udder madness of Apocalypse Cow. Its beefed up with enough action to keep the pace feeling almost frenetic, even when there’s really not that much going on. The characters are disturbingly believable, though the representation of the vegan might offend other vegans.

I was surprised to find that I actually ended up caring about Geldof, the youngest of the crew, and even Lesley and Terry. The rest of them were take or leave (primarily because they were bull-headed toe-rags.) It was ridiculous, hilarious, disturbing and odd, and definitely supplants Year Zero as the best comedy book I read in 2015.

*Horror with a Comedic Twist*

The Plot: George and Lou are two thugs that freelance as transporters. They take a job on that involves delivering a werewolf to bigger thugs who aren't quite as friendly. Things go very wrong when the wolf escapes.

My Thoughts: I don't really read a whole lot of horror. I have to be in a certain mood for it. But I find myself wishing this style of horror was its own genre. I would read more of it if it were. Jeff Strand does an excellent job of turning the grisly into a punchline. Hilarious and witty, I loved to hate Ivan (the werewolf) and hated that I found him somewhat charming when he wanted to be. The story was solid and still left you with about as much as a feel-good type of ending as you could hope for in a horror novel. Scott Thomas, the narrator, did a great job with the voices. Overall, this was an enjoyable listen and I would definitely read or listen to something by this author again.

**This audiobook was provided by the author, narrator, or publisher at no cost in exchange for an unbiased review courtesy of Audiobook Blast.