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review 2016-01-28 13:29
Finished – One Rogue At A Time: Sex
One Rogue at a Time (Rakes and Rogues) - Carmen Rose,Jade Lee

sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex plot sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex sex 

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review 2015-09-13 00:28
Finished – Hell or High Water: What I know . . .
Hell or High Water (The Deep Six) - Julie Ann Walker

How sexy he finds her.

What he wants to do to her.

How long he's wanted to do it.

His feeling on all the parts of her body.

What her breasts look like.

What her nipples look like.

What they taste like.

What her vagina looks like.

What her vagina feels like.

What her vagina tastes like.

Everything he wants to do with her vagina.

What he does to her vagina.

How wet her vagina is.

How sexy she finds him.

What she wants to do with him.

How long she has wanted to do it.

Her feeling on all the parts of his body.

What his body looks like.

What his penis looks like.

How erect his penis is.

How big and erect his penis is.

What color his penis is when it is super erect.

What his penis looks like as it is erect.

What the veins of his penis look like as he is getting erect.

What his penis feels like in her hands.

What his penis tastes like.*

What his penis feels like in side her.

What both their genitalia looks like as he moves in and out of her.

What both their genitalia looks like when he pulls out of her.

What the build up to orgasm feels like.

What the orgasm feel like and do to them.

How much they want to do all the sex again.

 

What I don't know . . .

 

Why in the hell these two think they're in love with each other.

 

 

 

Yeah, graphic (though not as graphic as the actual book) but I think represents my problem here well. This book was all show when it came to sex but nothing but tell when it came to them being in "love". They knew each other nearly two years ago in Syria is as much as we're given. In this book they're either talking about the mission or sex. There was one little spate of getting to know each other's backgrounds. "He loved her and now he wanted to know everything about her." Sigh. Okay.

 

Oddly, there was a secondary couple that met during the book and THEY had real conversation and I can see what they have in common and would like about each other outside of sexual attraction. Why couldn't we get any of that for the primary couple? I might listen to the next book if the library gets it if it is this secondary couple hoping that we'll get even more of a foundation since there is at least already one in place for that story.

 

The other major problem with future books in this series, aside from knowing there'll be an overabundance of graphic sex supplanting story and unnecessary POV jumping is this strange thing of Walker describing the women as so diminutive they look like children. Thankfully the heroine of this book was adult sized. But the hero of the secondary couple initially thought the heroine was a little boy. Then called her a sexy cherub. Uh, ew. At the end of the book the historian they hired showed up and it's clear she's going to be the heroine of a future book and she's described as looking like a little girl at first. What is that? That's so creepy. Especially when they're going to be paired with these massive former Navy SEALS. It kind of reminded me of seeing Hayden Panettiere and her husband at first. See? But worse because it's going to be so graphically described.

 

Meh. We'll see. If the library gets any more of this series in and whether or not I run out of other things to listen to I might listen to the next book.

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review 2015-02-16 01:20
Finished. Barely.
Animal Magnetism - Karen White,Jill Shalvis

The extra half star is only for the animals in the book. Who were far more interesting than any of the human characters. I've wanted to read this series for a long time, so this is really disappointing. It's another one of those vapid books that's all sex and no relationship building whatsoever. Another book where I spend the majority of the time rolling my eyes because it's nothing but noticing body parts and how omgsohawt each other are and if I have to hear about her nipples being hard one more time I might smash my phone a little bit (it's what I play my audiobooks on). Shalvis skipped over the actual first date but spent forever and a damn day on the sex scene of that night. They never really talked about anything of substance. Not until the very end of the book and not even for that long. It was mostly sex and sexual innuendo.

 

*SPOILERISH* I was so bored and annoyed that absolutely nothing was going on but sex that I was actually rooting for the heroine to get shot in one scene. Thankfully she did, in the arm. But did that slow them down? OF COURSE NOT. They were screwing that very same night. And every night after. Then she jumps into the lake to skinny dip with him even though her arm still hurts and there are still stitches in it to be just so cute and spontaneous and quirky! Ugh.

 

The only conflict was the hero's wanderlust. He was always going to leave because he can't stay tied down anywhere. That was it. His inevitable realization at the end was  lackluster and entirely snooze-worthy. So were the declarations. Of course they had both been talking about feelings and pieces of their hearts throughout the book, which triggered a lot of my eye rolling because why? I kept asking that. I don't get why they had any feelings other than wanting and the possibility of missing sex.

 

On, top of that the narrator was not good, which didn't help matters. She was fairly monotone, especially in the hero's voice. Everyone pretty much sounded the same (except the animals) and only mildly felt any emotions at all.

 

While part of me wants to try the other two in the series because it's hard to let go of having wanted to read them, I won't because I doubt I can expect more from those books either. I'm just so sick of alleged romances that completely skip out on the whole romance part of the story.

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review 2014-10-07 02:49
Finished – THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE.
Rescue Me - Rachel Gibson

Okay, no, there can be both: romance and erotica. My question is what in the hell makes this a romance and not an erotic romance? There is nothing between the hero and heroine but sex until like 83% into the book. Of course they only knew each other for like two days before getting it on. Sex is nearly all they think or talk about, really. It's so vapid and irritating. Gibson made sure to tell us repeatedly, ad nauseum that they want sex and they were only in it for the sex and nothing else and SEX IS ALL IT WILL EVER BE THEY'RE FRIENDS WITH BENEFITS THAT IS ALL THEY WILL EVER BE EVER UNTIL IT'S OVER LATHER RINSE REPEAT. There was so much in this book that was obnoxiously repetitive. It drove me nuts. Almost as much as there only being somewhat graphic sex between the two. And, really, they weren't friends with benefits. That would imply a friendship and there really wasn't one until about 80% into the book. And then it was only sort of an evolving relationship. I can think of maybe five conversations they had that didn't center around sex. And most of those devolved into sexual innuendo, sex talk, etc. anyway. The better description for them would be fuck buddies. That term denotes that the only thing between them is sex. I was so very annoyed throughout most of this book. I'm so supremely tired of erotic romances being marketed as romance. There needs to be a clearly delineated difference!

 

Then a thing happens and he's kind of there for her, sort of. Five days out of two months. And then she's in love. Cue my eye roll. How? And then he's in love. Seriously? HOW? How are they in love? Other than emotional upheaval there's no reason why she "falls" for him. And there's no reason why he suddenly wants her as a whole and not just for her body to break his 'I never do relationships' streak. You can tell us they are in love all you want, but I need you to show it to me. Gibson did not.

 

Then, if the above weren't bad enough, with seven percent of the book left this out-of-left-field needlessly over-dramatic bombshell is dropped. It has nothing to do with the hero and heroine as a couple, and then it's ignored! The book ends with NO FREAKING RESOLUTION OF THAT SUBPLOT. WHO FREAKING DOES THAT?! WHERE WAS THE EDITOR?? I'm still flabbergasted about this. Introducing the subplot in the first place was bad, but just letting it dangle there and ending the book? That right there has me thinking I won't be reading/listening to another Rachel Gibson novel.

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