Tonight I had watched in horror the degradation of human beings.
Emily might have watched the degradation of humans.Tonight, I watched in horror the degradation of the written word. Mild spoilers ahead. Read at your own peril.
Strike 1 : The male lead is in a rock band and is also an underground fighter - NAMED SCULPT.
What? He's not also in a Motorcycle Club? If we're going to milk a bunch of trends in multiples, let's not leave anything out.
Strike 2 : The male lead calls his woman Pigeon errr Kitten errr Mouse.
I sense a pattern with the trending/imitation. At least he didn't call her baby over and over...oh wait. He did.
Strike 3 : The lack of a mom as a role model does not excuse this type of thinking :
"I never took you against your will. Ever."
He was right, he never did. Even when he fucked me in the dining hall he'd asked me.
Emily was put into the situation of forced slavery because Sculpt/Logan kidnapped her and forced her to be there. Even if she'd agreed to have public sex to keep herself alive, she was still FORCED to do so by being put into the situation against her will.
I went to slap him again, but this time he caught my wrist.
"Once, I'll take. Not twice."
The...fuck? Two years later, Emily is still terrified from what Logan did to her and allowed to have done to her. He deserved to have his ass beat over and over, and he should've taken it like a man if he wanted her forgiveness. A real alpha male would humble himself and accept a second slap in exchange for the emotional, sexual, and physical abuse which had been done because of him.
"You owe him-"
No, Emily doesn't owe Logan shit. Even if he had risked his life ten times over to save her - if she doesn't want to talk to him ever again, she SHOULDN'T HAVE TO. Why do none of the characters in this book seem to get that? Even her own friends never validated her experience.
I had no right to hate him, and I had.
Sigh. She just...doesn't...get...it.
All sweet was out; hot and scary with a teaspoon of sweet was in.
This type of thinking bugs the hell out of me. Why, you ask? Because in this book, scary actually means scary. Even though I like my "dangerous" heroes (any man who can and will defend his woman is a huge turn-on for me), can we get out of the damn mindset that sweet is somehow "lesser?" I didn't expect a nice guy in this book because of the content, but can we quit romanticizing crap behavior and praise the beta males, the nice males, and the non-asshole alphas? Oh wait, to praise them would mean we'd have to find them. The "non-jerk guys are unicorns" rant will have to wait for another time.
Twenty Missed Calls.
Most people would consider anything more than a couple of calls excessive and creepy.
*** Three strikes and you're out, right?
Not quite...in this game, there were a couple of foul balls in-between those strikes.
Lack of editing : or why good indie authors cry when everyone else ruins it for them. I make typos constantly, use commas excessively, and fail at grammar (my own reviews make me cringe sometimes). So IF I'M NOTICING problems, we're talking about serious editing issues here.
His steal tone whispered in my ear. *What is he stealing?
My popsicle and I was melting into him further and further. *If your head is hurting, know that you are not alone.
I started to pull away and he groaned then his arm tightened around me. *Awkward sentence structure, this is. Yes, I Yoda'd that bitch.
...and if he gave it to me physically than I'd take it. *You'd take it instead of what?
I knelt on the floor my heat thumping erratically at his unexpected early appearance. *I spot two things that are off with this sentence. Do you?
"If you ever want to... Shit, Emily." *If you ever want to shit, Emily? Uh, ew.
He knew Emily. *Who knew Emily? I think when you're speaking to Emily about something that another person knew, you might mean : He knew, Emily.
(for the record, that is not my spelling of punctuation)
It's really too bad that a sliver of potential was wasted this badly...
The first 20% of this book was good. I'm not even kidding. Yeah, I'd read the reviews comparing Torn From You to Captive in the Dark, and I do agree that there was something about the writing style which read like a poor man's Captive. But I liked what I was reading - until the train went off the rails. WhileCaptive certainly had some flaws, where it worked was in the interpretation of the male lead. Caleb in Captive was even more disturbed than Logan was, but the readers were not shoveled a bunch of bull about how he changed into a romantic lead further into the story. Logan didn't want to hurt Emily - okay, I get that he was forced - but the point is that he DID. So when the rest of the book took a turn into him being possessive instead of apologetic, it left a sour taste in my mouth. Leave that shit for the bedroom. Tie her up, tie her down, spank her ass, whatever. The second I saw that he wasn't on his knees begging over and over for forgiveness (or walking the hell away like a decent human being would do), he lost all credibility with me. Instead, I got to listen to Emily wax poetic about how her feelings for Logan were "soul gripping." We went from an interesting and twisted story to an obsessive and creepy love story.
I just realized that I need to wrap things up. Sorry for the abrupt "I'm done." This review is long enough. I am going to quit looking at my notes, or we'll be here another hour. I'll leave you with one last WTF? tidbit.
Sadly, the inner goddess has been replaced by children's toys. Emily has legos in her head. I still don't get that. Apparently, legos can be built and knocked down inside of her brain. Yes, it does appear as strange as it seems.