This is not a promo thread. Discuss events, panels, what surprised you or disappointed you. Honest discussion welcome.

Meh!

I'm still waiting for an investigation or exposition about why GRL became what it is in 2013 and what it was like in its first run in 2011.

I created this group because I am interested in the same thing. From where I am sitting, GRL is a joke and an embarrassment. The face of the genre is cock-themed art, gyrating porn stars, and finger painting supposedly gay men. I understand that the majority of readers are charmed by that, but I do not count myself as one of them and most of my reader-friends are of the same mind. M/M has been equated to gay porn, and I am continuously shocked at the amount of people who are willing to be publicized at such an event. I would never want to be caught on camera for fear that my employers, my children or other adult friends would see me memorialized at a "porn star finger painting" event on the Internet.

Created this thread* >-< Why can I not edit?

Not to say that all of it is bad, I can't say that. It seems that there are a remote few panels that are not shameless author promotion and marketing (such as Bump in the Night), but much of it its kitchy and shameless, and I'm surprised at how the women in this genre swallow the obvious ploys that gay authors use to gain attention and a fanbase.

What astonishes me in that respect is that so many authors state that they don't (fetishise). I believe this (the fetishising of gay men by mostly straight women) is the number 1 criticism many gay readers have. Of course that's hypocritical in a way. But having it so out in the open is a bit disconcerting.

Precisely. It goes even beyond the obsession only with sex, but in the way a lot of women in this genre want to have a gay pet of their very own. They ooh and aah over the very few men in this genre to the point of mothering or obsessing/fetishising, and unfortunately with a few rare exceptions, the men encourage it by a number of antics that are being observed now at GRL. The cycle will never change as long as the male writers use it as a way to get sales and play into it.

I have friends who went last year, I have friends who are there now, and both of them observe grown men (30s-50s) clearly playing up their relationship or sexuality to titillate readers. These are not professional writers. They are not having discussions about writing or their projects. They're playing games. It's a cycle of playing into unhealthy obsessions and fetishising to capitalize.

To me it just looks weird and embarrassing to have so many straight women at an even about gay romance. Male gay romance, because let's face it, they're not celebrating lesbians, even if some of the writers are. I know, I am probably a hypocrite, because I read that shit too, but when I see a mass of women crowded around a dude in a jock strap who is not remotely interested in them (and thus safe?) it makes me wish I didn't.

Or trailing around in packs behind the gay authors... :/ It would almost make sense if the authors weren't gay but I think they'd be more aggressive if they thought they had a chance.

I remember several years ago a friend and me were in the LoTR RPS fandom (geeky and humiliating to admit but I was only a teenager!), and we went to a talk show where the actors were present. It was the second time I'd met them in person, and one of them remembered! I was so embarrassed. I felt like a stalker.

The author whining in this genre is beyond compare. The Josh Lanyon group on goodreads has some prime author whines in the threads.

And where 'hang out' is a euphemism for 'whine incessantly'.

I've had a peek at those blog posts. Let me state it baldly (and don't shoot me for this please):

I still can't understand the attraction of such events. As a reader I really prefer not to know that much or have that much physical or direct interaction with an author. While there are authors I would have liked or would like to talk with, discuss things etc., that is nothing which is possible at such an event. In general I'd rather not know much about the person whose books I read. As an author, I already refuse readings and signings. So what could ever incite me to make an appearance at such an event? It doesn't help write.

Reply to post #17 (show post):
Hi all - I'm gonna jump in here as one of those authors who is silly enough to go to these things. First off, I need to say that nothing that's been said here offends me. I absolutely understand. But I think the proliferation of photos and the hysteria over certain events that you see on, say, Facebook, tends to skew what happens to the event.

I'm shy. I have personal space issues. I would never, ever gyrate with a stripper or body paint someone (and some of those authors being painted are people I know.) I don't tag along with the squee crowds around certain male authors. So why do I go?

Ah. Visibility. The genre is crowded. If one wants sales, at some point, one really does need to begin connecting. GRL is only one venue. There are others - but the serious authors do it to connect with each other, with readers, with industry contacts.

What did I do at the last one? I had a reading. I love to read aloud and there were several folks who have now read my stories because of it. (Yes, I'm shy, but I can put on the stage persona when I have to.) I was on a Science Fiction panel with a couple of wonderful authors where we talked about the evolution of gay SF, about the need for more science in the genre, about the difficulty women have being taken seriously as SF writers and so on. I got to do a signing and talk to readers, to connect with a new publisher and have a pitch with an agent.

So is it all embarrassing parties and squee-ing? No. There's that element. But you pick and choose how you participate in these things and what you get out of it. It's not for everyone - but m/m authors do need exposure and this is one of the venues that helps.