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review 2016-05-11 00:00
The Flood
The Flood - Steven Scaffardi The Flood - Steven Scaffardi The story picks up about 6 months after The Drought took place (I can't tell you all too much about Dan's life here because it would spoil the heck out of the first book): Dan is foolish enough to make a bet with his three friends: Rob, Jack, and Ollie. I'm saying foolish because these are the exact rules for it:

1) Within six weeks, you must be dating four girls simultaneously. No online dating or apps allowed.
2) One of those girls must be [insert female character from the first book]
3) The moment you start dating the fourth girl, you have two weeks to juggle all four girls to prove you are a true player.
4) You must arrange to meet all four girls at least once during the same week.
5) Complete this challenge and you complete The Flood and win the bet. 

image
*Cue Mission Impossible theme*

Of course, this can only become a great disaster! Unlike in the previous book, though, the situations are somewhat less predictable. Heck, there were a few that kept my eyes glued to my Kindle screen because I wanted to find out what was behind door #3!

We meet some lovely socially awkward and/or disturbing characters. Ieuan (apparently pronounced as YIGH-un, who knew?) is a rather geeky Welsh guy who's new at Dan's office. There's some great chemistry between him and Jack, who insistently keeps calling him 'Iron'.
However, my favourite new character must be Dan's autistic new roommate...

Evil_Abed_takes_over_Abed_in_the_Prime_Timeline.png

I found this book to be written slightly better than the first one. I also had to laugh out loud quite a few times. Some of my favourite quotes:

"Probably not the best time for a wank, but it could have been my last!"

"I once kissed a girl that looked like Ruud van Nistelrooy. Does that count?"

Then there was a Carlton Banks dance reference and a Craig David reference, which makes me get to the following: amongst Dan and his friends, everything can be turned into a popular (preferably '80's or '90's) song, albeit with slightly different lyrics. It's pretty embarrassing to tell you guys about this, but that's what's going on in this house quite a few hours of the day. Every day....
So "Blue Moob, I saw you wearing a bra" could've been sung in my house easily and will probably be added to the repertoire from now on. Popular ones are also "It's the final cuntdown", "You're my heart, you're my boob", and "I wanna know what boobs are (I want you to show me)". Reading about other people doing this as well, made me feel a lot more normal. *twitches eye*

The Flood has awkwardness, a little bit of suspense, romance and comedy packed up neatly together. If you want to read something fun, I can highly recommend picking up this series. And yes, I'm calling it a series because the ending is hinting very unsubtly at a third book. I was hoping to read more about Dan and his friends, so I'm really looking forward to part 3, whenever it may be published. If you don't feel like reading several books for whatever reason, you can just jump into this one without having to read The Drought first. The characters are properly re-introduced in the beginning with a little recap here and there of the previous story, so you can just pretend this is a standalone novel. However, why would you want to do that??

I'm giving it four brownies with a generous amount of ice- and whipped cream on top!

sundaesundaesundaesundae

A big thank you to Steven Scaffardi for providing me with a copy of his book in exchange for an honest opinion!

There's a hilarious Character Q&A I did with Steven Dan, Rob, Ollie and Jack on my blog here as part of the Lad Lit blog tour!
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review 2016-05-07 00:00
The Drought
The Drought - Steven Scaffardi This was a welcome light-hearted read after having read some pretty sinister ones lately. British down to earth humour when it comes to understanding the opposite sex (this applies to both men and women)!

When I was just checking out the cover again while pasting it in here, I immediately had to think of the following video clip. If you think this is even remotely funny, you're going to love this book. If not, oh well, tough luck, you should still try this book.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FbtI8zBxqyc

So we're basically following Dan and his three-friended posse. Dan's just like the synopsis describes him: a nice guy. With an overdeveloped sense for the dramatic, if you will.

“Eight months without sex. People had committed crimes and been given lesser sentences.“

His friends are quite the gems as well:

First of all, we’ve got Rob, Dan’s best friend since primary school, who’s the good looking, smart mannered, stylishly clothed, big-hearted guy who gets all the women. I thought I was going to hate his guts for being such a player, but honestly, I can’t help but truly liking him (see the words 'big-hearted' up here), He’s such a great friend to Dan, helping him whenever he can, and treats all his ‘trophies’ with respect, sort of? Don’t get me wrong, he’s still a first class wanker, but…a likable one? *brain freeze*

Then there’s Jack, who reminds me a bit of a foul-mouthed leprechaun due to his endless stream of NSFW-remarks together with being of a modest height. Even if he’s a cheating, disrespectful, chlamydia-spreading donkey arse, again, I can’t help but like him? Okay, so what the flying fuck’s going on here Scaffardi?! Is there some brainwashing hypnotic element hidden in the Kindle text version? Should I try the paperback to see if it makes any difference?

Erm, yes, and then, last but not least, there’s Ollie. I’ve met quite a few Ollies in real life actually, but can always laugh at the level of stupidity they incorporate. Ollie’s an active member of the local gym but seriously lacks some brain capacity. This makes him a laid back, not too picky kind of guy to be around with and he definitely adds some hilarity to the story with his idiotic comments.

If you want to know more about the characters, there’s a detailed ‘Meet the Characters’ section on Steven’s website here. Love it!

Ah yes, there’s an author involved here, so I guess I have to say something about the writing style as well eh? Since I forgot there was even an author due to the characters coming alive brilliantly, I think this says enough doesn’t it? Okay, okay, maybe I should just drop a few more notes on the matter. It was great, but sometimes it reminded me a bit more of a movie script instead of a book. I actually wouldn’t be surprised if someone ever decides to turn it into a movie; the visual scenes are already there! Do you think Benedict Cumberbatch might be too old to play Rob? Jack O’Connell would probably make a great Jack if he can drop the Derby accent…but I’m digressing here!

I didn’t laugh all throughout the book, but I did giggle out loud a few times which is good enough for me and my [insert resting bitch face]. What I also did was poke my hubby in the shoulder while reading and going “Omg, so this is MAN LOGIC?!“

“I would tell her that anything that happened over six months ago is inadmissible in an argument.“

Something about not calling your mother when you need to tell her something important, and:

“She was smart, funny, and easy going. It was a huge bonus that she had big boobs.“

These things have been done/mentioned literally by said hubby several times. I need to read more Lad Lit in the hope of deciphering some more of this odd behaviour…

The story in itself was quite predictable most of the time, but I didn’t mind all too much. I’m giving it 4 brownies and can highly recommend it whenever you’re in need of a read to lift your spirits. Don’t shy away from the Lad Lit tag as a woman, it’ll be just as funny and even might be insightful to how unbelievably irrational we can get at times. I recognised myself in Dan’s ex-girlfriend Stacey for a bit and immediately made a note to self to never pull off any of that emotional extortion shit ever again. Or at least until my next cycle comes up.

A big thank you to Steven Scaffardi for providing me with a copy of his book in exchange for an honest opinion! Be sure to check out the #LadLitBlogTour as well, in which I will take part myself with a review of the sequel to The Drought: The Flood, and a Character Q&A on the 16th of May!
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review 2016-03-14 15:41
The Drought: Sex, Love and Dating Disasters - Steven Scaffardi

Dan Hilles is just a normal guy with a job, a small group of friends and a long-term girlfriend, but not for long. Things start to change for Dan when he breaks-up with his girlfriend Stacey and he finds himself single again for the first time in three years. Unfortunately for him things don't change in his favour and he enters a period of drought.
With some near death experiences, more than a couple of awkward dates and some really embarrassing situations, things are getting real complicated. But Dan has a goal and he will not stop until he ends the drought.

I received a free copy from the author in exchange for an honest review.

"We sang it loud. We sang it proud. We sang it with passion. We sang it completely tone deaf. But it didn't matter. It was the perfect end to the evening."

Dan has been with Stacey for three years now but she has changed a lot since he met her at university. It all goes wrong at new years even when they get into another fight and Dan decides to spend the night with his friends instead of with her. After the nearly fifty messages she left him that night alone, he decides to put an end to it. But things don't really go as planned and instead of breaking up kind of 'peacefully' he gets kicked out of the house by Stacey best friend Sophie who wants to kill him with a baseball bat. 
From that point on things change, but not for the better. Time and again Dan gets himself into the must stupid and surreal situations, even his friends are unable to help him break the drought and as it goes on Dan is getting more desperate.
Rob, Ollie and Jack try to help him as best as they can but even their knowledge combined can't save Dan from making a complete fool of himself. He even manages to get on the television twice! (not under the best circumstances but heej there is no such thing as bad publicity right?)

So yes I did read the sequel first but that doesn't matter because this book is just as awesome, funny and amusing ^_^ Why you ask? Well here is why:

This book is everything I hoped it would be. There are the familiar yet unimaginable situations he is able to get into. He does it all on his own and I have to say that is very impressive. I've got more than one favourite scene is this book but I think that this one is the one I loved the most:

"'I bumped into Simon Peterson yesterday.' Rob said. 'He lives on Mantilla Road.'
'So what?' I sneered.
'He happened to mention that he saw you on his road on Wednesday night,' Rob announced. 'He was working on his car. He would have said hello, but you sprinted past him at a ferocious pace with a dog chasing you.'
'Was it a poodle?' Ollie questioned.
'No it wasn't a poodle,' I said. 'It was a big horrible, snarling beast.'
'Simon said it was a sausage dog.' Rob said and they all started laughing again.

This is a scene where Dan is having a drink with his friends and yes they're making fun of him again. Now what happened before this is quite hilarious because it has to do with a date that would have stopped Dan's drought. Dan got a second chance with Grace and just as they were going to take it one step further, he discovers that he doesn't have any condoms with him. Getting dressed to get some at a store nearby, he runs out of Grace's house but by the time he has to get back he finds out that he has no idea how to get back at all. That is when, after walking some time, he encounters a big horrible snarling beast... that turned out to be a sausage dog.

This book was so much fun to read and even though I read the second book first it didn't affect me at all because everything that happened was just as unexpected. The amazing characters combined with the easy use of language, the everyday scenes and hilarious situations made for a great book.
Again this book brings the whole dating-scenario from a totally different perspective. Not from the female point of view but from a man's and that makes it all the more fun to read. It is that I am a woman myself but by reading this I understand that most man don't understand women at all, sometimes even I don't understand women (or myself for that matter) at all.
Some of the language and scenes might be a little too harsh or descriptive for some people but that just made it better in my opinion.

Overall I think the book was great and it was so much fun to read. I would recommend this book to everyone who loves romance/comedy/chicklit kind of novels. I give this book four stars because me really likey.

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review 2012-10-30 00:00
The Drought - Steven Scaffardi This sounds like a fun read. :)
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