4.25 Warm Fuzzy (but not sappy sweet) Stars

Joe and Ed have been together for 2.5 years. They live together. They are seemingly committed. But they haven't ever bothered to DTR (define the relationship). Joe, it appears, has never really even considered his feelings for Ed. Ed, on the other hand, has probably thought about it but is okay keeping his feelings unexpressed.

Then a new opportunity presents itself to the couple and their lives undergo a big change. Suddenly they are relying on each other more and more. It becomes harder for them to deny that they share real feelings for each other and that the relationship is more than just a convenience and great sex. Each man slowly admits to himself that he needs the other, but they continue to resist saying those three magic words.

There were a lot of things I loved about this book. It was a book about being in love rather than falling in love. I have said it before, I love those books where the initial infatuation has passed but the fire is still burning strong. The issues of struggling with family and community acceptance were beautifully handled. Maybe it all worked out a bit too perfectly for real life, but that's the beauty of fiction. The story line was fairly unique and didn't feel like this was a book I have already read a dozen times before with slightly different nuances.

Here is the only thing that bugged me. I knew they were in love. Everyone around them knew they were in love. Why didn't they know it? The reluctance of the men to DTR was the basis of this story, but the reason behind it was never really explained. I would have liked to have known what it was in their lives that stopped them from embracing the full reality of their relationship for so long.

Cultivating Love - Linn Henderson Well, this book was a little depressing. It was written really well and I loved the concept of the story, but the ending was just so hard to read. Now the shoe is on the other foot and absolutely no compassion.

Not my cup of tea, but I will definitely try this author again.

3.5

It took me a while to get through this book - this seems more designed as a help for studying particular Buddhist sutra texts, not something I'm interested in doing. The tone is always gentle with Thich Nhat Hanh, but I could barely remember what he spoke of from one reading to the next. This would be helpful if you wanted in-depth study, but not so much for someone looking for reminders and maybe a few mantras to focus on during meditation.

3.5 stars

I really loved the idea of this story. Rather than a typical "boy meets boy, boys fall in love" m/m romance, this is about two men who are already in a committed relationship but are afraid to really show affection. They never use the word love, are very strict about whose "turn" it is to top, and never venture beyond strict intercourse in the bedroom. (i.e. no blow jobs, no cuddling, etc.)
Circumstances in their life sort of force them to make a more verbal commitment to each other ("We're solid, right? I mean, forever solid?" "Well, uh, yeah, I guess."), and they start to open up to each other and try new things and eventually admit that they're in love.

The story started out really strong. The reticence of the characters to acknowledge their feelings or show any kind of affection was kind of cute and I found myself smiling a lot. There were a lot of really good scenes where they were both miserable that they had to be separated for a few days, but of course would never actually say anything. And then they had great reunion sex. And the scenes showing how they settled into their new life in this little town and on their farm, it was all really sweet.

The only thing that made this less satisfying was the ending. Not that it didn't end well; it did. I guess I just wanted a little bit... more. More fireworks, more passion, more declarations of undying love. I don't know. I'm a hopeless romantic, and even though this story was super sweet and it was obvious that they loved each other, I was just hoping for some big climactic scene. (There was definitely a climactic scene, but it wasn't all that romantic.) They did eventually use the "L" word, but after showing how they held back from each other for so long, I just wanted to see it all explode. It didn't.
And I guess the point of the story was to show that deeper, more abiding love that comes from lifelong commitment and shared purpose, true partnership. Which is great and all. I just wanted more of the other as well.