Tag: Cokie-Roberts • BookLikes

quote 2013-10-18 18:54

A woman in Michigan said she listened to the book on tape and then gave it to her lesbian partner. They were particularly interested in our story about inviting a gay couple to our annual Chanukah party: 'I believe it is important for you, as two professionals who make a living analyzing and shaping public policy and culture, to hear that both of your books are relavant to same-sex couples and their families.' We're pleased to hear that. While we're uncomfortable with gay marriage we strongly support the sort of 'civil union' adopted by Vermont earlier this year. As we wrote in our newspaper column: 'Conservatives say civil union reflects the "moral rot" in society but the very reverse is true. In our own circle of friends and family, we've known a number of gay couples who simply want what every heterosexual couple wants--intimacy, understanding, constancy. Partners who want to make a life together should be shored up and not shut out, respected not rejected.'

From This Day Forward - 'Cokie Roberts', 'Steven V. Roberts'

- Cokie and Steve Roberts

I'm sorry, but I'm "uncomfortable" with their being "uncomfortable" with same-sex marriage, especially right before they go on to say gay couples want what "every heterosexual couple wants." After writing a whole book about how lovely marriage is, they twist the knife on the last page by saying they're "uncomfortable" with same-sex couples having this same blessing. WTF, Cokie and Steve? My guess is that they're trying not to alienate their conservative OR their liberal readers, but sometimes you just can't have it both ways -- and that paragraph certainly alienated me.

quote 2013-10-18 12:39

A Reading Vocation

In your parents' eyes, you become an adult when you have children. In your own eyes, I think you fully become an adult and fully aware of your own mortality when you lose a parent.

- Cokie Roberts

Exactly what my mom always said. That day hasn't come for her yet -- my almost-sixty mom is not "fully adult" by this definition. I am not looking forward to when that day comes for her, or for me.

This reflection came at the point in the book when Steve Roberts was reflecting on the death of his father, which happened quickly from a series of strokes. It reminded me of my own grandmother's brush with death two years ago now, when she was hospitalized for a severe allergic reaction. I remember sitting with my mom in the ICU, how Grandma's face was so red, her hair so oddly white against it. I remember when they decided to switch from life support to "comfort measures only," and how Krystl and I drove down to Sioux Falls to say goodbye to her that Friday night. We were at the hospital for hours, shuffling between a lobby that played reality TV and had computers and Grandma's room.

I was supposed to go to Duluth that weekend, and I wasn't sure if I should go. Mom told me to go ahead. She had this dazed expression; she said, "I'm grieving. I'm not going to be normal for a while. I'm saying goodbye to my mom."

While Grandma was dying--and she was dying--she turned to my mom and my aunts, who had taken turns staying with her all week, she said, "This has been fun, hasn't it?" She meant it, too. It wasn't often she got to spend so much time with her daughters, all together.

I went to Duluth and tried not to think about it all weekend, knowing Grandma would probably be dead by the time I returned. I called Mom on Sunday night as I drove home to ask how she was. To my surprise, she was sitting up in bed watching a baseball game. She was doing better.

She made it, off life support, without medication, without intervention. When all that was stripped away, she began to live again.

She's still here. My mom got to remain a child a little longer.