" If you make a rule, be sure it is one you can and are willing to monitor and reward or punish as appropriate. Then let it go. You can imagine how miserable that is for him in July in Florida.

He was 3. Most adults cannot even do that. If you take away the toy forever, the child has less motivation to behave than if he believes he will get it back through good behavior. (You will probably have to tinker with this until you get the feel for exactly how to make the punishment fit the crime.

When I go by myself, if he misbehaves, we just leave and he loses a privilege when we get home. Go over it with your child and make sure she understands what they all mean. Do not start a battle of wills and refuse to see it through because that just creates a more willful child. Without guidance and structure, they will do whatever they want and have to learn what you want through trial and error.

My parents had a chair in the hallway. Additionally, explain to them that they are losing the toy, privilege or activity for a certain amount of time, but by behaving appropriately, they can have it back after that.