Confession time. The only reason I read this book was because I was at the library, it was sitting there on the shelf at eye level and I was facing a bookless bus ride home. To say my enthusiasm for diving in to this story that I'd so actively opted not to read so many times was low, would be generous.

Hi. I'm Tellulah Darling and I'm an idiot. I don't know what my problem was because I'd read Raeder's Unteachable about a student/teacher relationship and if (I'm going to refer to the author as Elliot Wake now because he has transitioned), he could get me fully onboard with that subject matter and loving that book, my reticence here was a mystery. Wait - no it's not because I just re-read the synopsis and I thought it was every NA that I was tired of reading.

Oh, how wrong I was.

Black Iris is stupendous! I read it in about 3 hours, ignoring my entire family to do so. Dark, haunting, twisted, sublime, lush, this book has taken root in my brain and I suspect it will be a long time before I stop thinking about it. Where I expected it to zig, it zagged, when I was sure I understood a character, a bombshell was dropped on me. I couldn't set my smug reader expectations on this book and it was fabulous.

Take a primal revenge story, birth it in the devastation of mental illness, wrap it in several layers of sexual identity and heartbreaking homophobia and then shine it to a high gloss with the brittle beauty of Laney and Blythe. This book nails every single dizzying element. So don't be like me, go read it immediately, and bow before Wake's writing prowess.

Initial reaction: I'm still trying to decide how to do the review for this book. Should I do a standard discussion review to kind of vet out all of my feels on this book, or should I do "Black Iris: The Musical" - which would be all in verse? (ROGERS AND HAMMERSTEIN HAVE NOTHING ON YOU - you may say, but I don't have that kind of confidence. >.<;;;) Maybe I might do both? I honestly have no idea yet.

In any case, "Black Iris" was a read I really liked and appreciated for the journey collectively speaking. There were parts I wasn't so thrilled about but I figure that's a discussion I can leave for the full review. I'll have to meditate on it more so may be a little bit before I post the full review, whatever form it takes on.

Although I should say: "Burn Away" by the Birthday Massacre is definitely the song this book made my head come back to. ("There's a fire in the city of pictures/leaving nothing but ashes below/it's only forever for a day/Tomorrow is burning away.")

Edit #1: Oh crap, just on the mention of "The Birthday Massacre" - THIS BOOK COVER HAS THE SAME COLORS TBM'S ALBUM COVERS DO. MIND BLOWN. PERFECT MUSICAL REFERENCE IS PERFECT.

Edit #2: This book is dark as heck. And I feel like I could talk about it for days, which is going to make this review a challenge.

Full review:

Screw it, bumping this up to 4.5 stars. I do have some issues with the narrative that I'll point out towards the end of this review, but I just noted in my Top Ten Tuesday (and I wholeheartedly believe) this was one of my favorite reads of 2015. I won't end up breaking the character limit for this review, but I will expound a bit on what I enjoyed about this novel (though it's always difficult to try to explain the ways in which you love what you read/gained from the experience of what you read.)

I thought of about ten billion ways of writing this review, and I decided the best way for me to do that is just lay it out in general. Looking back on it, I think "Black Iris" was my favorite New Adult read of 2015 for the sheer amount of ways it cans so many of the tropes in NA, creates a vivid and flawed protagonist that feels realistic but not too over the top considering what her character goes through, AND has beautifully sensual and lyrical writing.

Laney is a complex and complicated character rolled into one. I yearn for dimensional (even flawed) characters and this narrative provided such an intimate perspective of her experience. Her thirst for revenge was something that repelled the everloving heck out of me, while at the same time drawing me in to read more. This book explores Laney's bisexuality, her struggle with mental illness (bipolar disorder), and instances where she's bullied and belittled to the point where you can put a finger on her anguish and pain. But it's also bent on her quest for revenge against those who wronged her.

"Black Iris" is a dark and lyrical narrative in and of its own consideration, and reading about Laney's relationships with both Armin and Blythe are intense, dreamy, and sensual. The whole time I read this book, I had the music of The Birthday Massacre playing on repeat in my head (well, that and CHVRCHES, but I blame the flawless music references in here - which actually set the mood of the novel quite well without being overbearing.) I almost thought the fourth wall breaking would be something that deterred me, but honestly - in Laney's favor and her respective voicing, I think it worked (and it gives the proverbial finger to those who overdo the NA cliches to death).

If I had to speak on something that detracted from my enjoyment of the novel on an overarching note, it would be that towards the end of the novel, I felt like the momentum of the plot struggled a bit marching towards its conclusion. The beginning and middle parts of the novel had me at hello and I didn't want to put the novel down unless I had to. But when I hit probably the last fourth of the novel and when the reveal came in that respect, I remember thinking that the way it tied things together wasn't as smooth as the rest of the novel had been, and part of that might've been narrative pacing and trying to tie the loose ends of the revenge plot while at the same time maintaining Laney's voice and mindset.

When I put the book down, I'll admit it left me with a lot to think about, and usually the books that leave me with that feeling end up being ones that remain with me for a long time. (So much I bought my own copy of the novel after reading my digital galley.) So I was considering rating it at 4 stars, but said screw it and bumped it up by half a star because it was one of the reading experiences that resonated with me from the past year. I'm glad I had the opportunity to read this, and can't wait to read more from Leah Raeder in the near future.

Overall score: 4.5/5 stars.

Note: I received this as an ARC from NetGalley, from the publisher Atria.

Hi all, Rose here with another Top Ten Tuesday entry.  This theme is brought to you by the Broke and the Bookish, and this week was a freebie entry, so I thought I'd do my top ten reads of 2015.  I'm still going to do a year end post, but it's still not compiled yet and I have a bit of catching up to do on my bookish profiles (I honestly didn't realize how far behind I was in keeping track of what I was reading last year.  Thankfully, I'm already doing a better job of that this year.)

So these aren't in any particular order and they aren't limited by publication year (as I'll do in my Best of 2015 entry).  These are all books I read in 2015 and ended up loving for what they offered.  All I ended up rating 4 stars or higher when I read them, with some books pending full reviews.  I hope you enjoy them as much as I did.

In no particular order:

1. "The Start of Me and You" by Emery Lord - this was the first read I've ever had from Emery Lord, and I adored every moment of it, from the writing to the character relationships built and explored in the narrative.  Paige and Ryan's characters really leap off the page with their respective situations of grief and coming to terms, and I absolutely loved the realistic feel of Paige's circle of friends.

2. "The Truth About Forever" by Sarah Dessen. Many people had begged me to pick up this book by Dessen since I was doing a binge reading of her books in 2015, and I wasn't disappointed in the least.  Loved the relationships of the characters, really identified with Macy's grief as she copes not only with the loss of her father, but also a broken relationship and trying to find her own identity.  Pretty updated cover as well.

3. "Dare Me" by Megan Abbott - "Dare Me" completely blew me away as one of my earlier reads in the year.  I loved how it managed to immerse me in the overarching mystery surrounding the novel as well as how dark and layered its characters were showcased.  It's definitely one of my new favorite books, and the writing is absolutely fantastic.

4. "Black Iris" by Leah Raeder - I keep thinking back to some of my favorite reads of 2015 in the New Adult category, and my mind keeps coming back to this.  Dark, lyrical writing, complex (and complicated) characters, deep sensuality that pops off the page, and just an overarching engaging read.  I did have some issues with how it marched toward the end, but the journey was so good that I would gladly pick up this novel again (and I ended up ordering a copy from Amazon even though I had gotten it from NetGalley as a galley.  Goes to show you that I do buy books based on how well they engage me even if I have a digital galley copy.

5. "Invisibility" by Andrea Cremer and David Levithan: Dude, I stayed away from this book for far too long because of the mixed reviews surrounding, and ended up loving it for the journey it offered.  I picked it up as an audio read from the library and loved the premise of a boy who's lived his whole life invisibie and the horrific curse that surrounds and threatens him.  I loved how wonderfully tense and palpable the scenes came across in this book, plus - magical realism?  Totally here for that.  I would still love to see a sequel of this if the authors could collaborate again. *crosses fingers*

6. "Glass" by Ellen Hopkins.  This book broke my heart. As problematic and flawed as the protagonist in this novel is, it's a potent example of the cycle of addiction.  I also liked how it was formatted in a poetic style - which is one of my first loves in writing, but for anyone who may be deterred from it because of that - the audiobook does a wonderful job of pacing and enunciating the emotion behind it.

7. "Faking Normal" by Courtney C. Stevens - a wonderfully potent book about a young woman living in the aftermath of her rape.  I actually rated "Blue-Haired Boy" (a companion novella to this story) a full five stars, but in considering it, I'd likely rate both of them among my favorite reads of 2015.  I'm definitely looking forward to reading more from Courtney C. Stevens in the future.

8. "All the Rage" by Courtney Summers - I think I'll end up loving mostly anything Courtney Summers writes because of how intimate she is with her characterizations and the topics she expounds upon.  This was an emotional read in more ways than one on the topic of rape as well.  And it features a character of color (Leon) who was absolutely wonderful in his portrayal.

9. "The Summer of Chasing Mermaids" by Sarah Ockler.  I squee with joy over this book, and continuously think it's underrated because not only does it feature an POC leading character, but it's just a wonderful coming of age summer story in general.  I feel like any review I write won't do it nearly enough justice, but I'm hoping to pen a review for it soon.  Indubitably one of my favorite reads of 2015, and I love Sarah Ockler's writing.

and last but not least *drumroll*....

10. "Golden Son" by Pierce Brown: Yet another book I have yet to review in full, but I loved it just as much as its predecessor, if not a bit more.  And I'm eagerly anticipating the final book in the trilogy which releases this year.

That's all for now.  Until next entry,

Rose

Another completed Bookish Bingo card!!

I did complete this one earlier in the month but held off writing my wrap up as I was reading a few other books that could cover certain squares if I finished them in time. I did, so here we are with a wrap up post.

Read but not Reviewed

The Girl at Midnight by Melissa Grey - Purple Cover - 5 stars

The Last Time We Say Goodbye by Cynthia Hand - Tearjerker - 5 stars

The Wrath and the Dawn by Renee Ahdeir - POC Writer -  4 stars

Bone Gap by Laura Ruby - Multi POV -  4 stars

Throne of Glass by Sarah J Maas - Magic 4.5 stars

Anna and the French Kiss by Stephanie Perkins - Cover Change (reread - reviewed previously but not reviewed again for this challenge) 5 stars

Read and Reviewed

Sight (Delta Girls #1) Juliet Madison - Face on Cover - Review 2 stars

What We Knew by Barbara Stewart - June July August release- Review 2 stars

Because You'll Never Meet Me by Leah Thomas - 2015 Debut - Review 5 stars

Black Iris by Leah Raeder - Out Of Your Comfort Zone - Review 5 stars

Kissing in America by Margo Rabb - Young Adult - Review 4 stars

Second Chance Summer by Morgan Matson - Beach Read - Review 5 stars 

Hello, Goodbye and Everything In Between by Jennifer E Smith - Title Is More Than Three Words - Review 3.5 stars

Fire in Title or on Cover: Heir of Fire by Sarah J Maas - Review 2 stars

Vengeance Road by Erin Bowman - Free Square - Review 4 stars

Ruby Red by Kirsten Gier - Time Travel - Review 1 star

The Queen (Selection #0.4) by Kiera Cass - Short Story - Review 4 stars

The Devil You Know by Trish Doller - Travel - Review 3 stars

In Mini Review Post

Some of the books I read I didn't feel like doing full reviews but wanted to say something so I did a mini review post for those Bookish Bingo books which can be seen here

Me and Earl and The Dying Girl by Jesse Andrews - Published Over a Year Ago 1 star

Eleanor & Park by Rainbow Rowell - Award Winner  3 stars

Cruel Beauty by Rosamund Hodge - Retelling 5 stars

Finish a Series - Evertrue (Everneath #3) by Brodi Ashton - 1 star

Life Eternal by Yvonne Woon - White Cover 4 stars

She Is Not Invisible by Marcus Sedgwick - MC With a Physical Disability 3 stars

Made You Up by Francesca Zappia - Blue Cover 5 stars

Best Books

Made You Up, Vengeance Road, Kissing in America, Black Iris, Anna and the French Kiss, Cruel Beauty, The Girl at Midnight, The Last Time We Say Goodbye

Worst Books

Me and Earl and The Dying Girl, Ruby Red, Evertrue, Sight

Honorable Mentions

Heir of Fire, She is not Invisible, The Devil You Know, The Wrath and the Dawn, Life Eternal, Second Chance Summer, Because You'll Never Meet Me

Belated wrap up for June

Read 17 books this month and two DNFed.  I completed Spring Bookish Bingo at the end of last month. (Still haven't got around to doing my wrap up post for that one yet) I had June as a free reading month, basically reading some Netgalley stuff and whatever else took my fancy at the time. 

Books Read

Static - Tawny Stokes - 3 Stars - In mini review post

Frozen (Heart of Dread 1) Melissa De La Cruz - DNF - No Stars - no review

Damage Done - Amanda Pantich - 4 Stars - Review

An Ember in the Ashes - Saaba Tahir - 5 Stars - in Mini Review post

Polarity in Motion - Brenda Vicars - 3 Stars - Review

The Start of Me and You - Emery Lord - 5 Stars - In mini Review post

What We Knew - Barbara Stewart - 2 Stars - Review

Emmy & Oliver - Robin Benway - 5 Stars - Review

Day 21 (The 100 #2) Kass Morgan - 3 Stars - In mini Review Post

Sight (The Delta Girls #1) Juliet Madison - 2 Stars - Review

The Shining - Stephen King - 5 Stars (reread for about the fifteenth time) no review

Because You'll Never Meet Me - Leah Thomas - 5 Stars - Review

Black Iris - Leah Reader - 5 Stars - in mini review post

These Broken Stars - Megan Spooner & Amie Kaufman - 3 Stars - in mini review post

Those Girls - Lauren Saft - 1 Star - Review

All The Bright Places - Jennifer Niven - 4 Stars - no review

Bone Gap - Laura Ruby - 4 Stars - no review

Dark Magic (Carpathians #4) Christine Feehan - no stars - DNF. Review to come

Blue Lily, Lily Blue (Raven Boys Quartet #3) Maggie Stiefvater 5 Stars - no review

Best Books This Month

The Start of me and You, An Ember in the Ashes, Emmy & Oliver, Bone Gap

Worst Books This Month

Dark Magic, Frozen, Those Girls

Honorable Mentions

What We Knew, All The Bright Places, Because You'll Never Meet Me, Black Iris

July plan - I started the new Great Imaginations reading challenge the other day (I'll have a post on that before long) and finish some more Netgalley stuff. I'm also on holiday for 7 days, so by the pool and by the beach reading to look forward to.