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review 2014-12-07 00:05
Bad, Horrible, Not Worth It
The Christmas Cottage - Samantha Chase

Summary:

Any couple who spends the night in the Christmas cottage shall have love everlasting...

Lacey Quinn did not believe in happily ever after or the legend of the Christmas cottage. As maid of honor for her best friend Ava, her duties included decorating the cottage for the newlyweds. It was a simple enough task, but she hadn't counted on sexy Ean Callahan, the bride-to-be's brother, to be assisting her.

Spending the evening ensconced in the overly romantic setting while a blizzard howls outside has Lacey wondering if fairy tales really do come true...

 

Review:

Good news - it was only 95-96 pages long.

 

Now on to why this book sucked (and not in a good way):

1. Twas the night before self-publishing this book and no proofreader was stirring, not even Spell check. Grammar? We don't need no stinking grammar. Dialogue was hard to follow since each person's piece was not always set off as a new paragraph. Typical SPA spit it out and upload. Every page had at least a couple of grammar, language, or spelling mistakes. Formatting was way off. It was originally published in November 2012; the author revised it and uploaded the revised version...at least on Amazon. I downloaded this book after the revision (I'm assuming, because there is a different cover than the one I have) from NOOK.

 

2. Lacey - whining and pining for Ean, who is the only man she ever loved or could love. Making her naïve and dull. Also, not a very good friend of Ava - enabler of Ava's stupid wedding plans while giving Ava reasons why she should not marry Mason (very good reasons). Lacey is so damn insecure, I felt I was reading YA or NA, not a story about 26 year old. Lacey needed so much re-assuring, it was pathetic. She pouts and throws temper tantrums - made for very awkward reading. She is so inconsistent - Lacey staunchly defends Ava and the wedding when Ean gives Ava the same reasons she gave to Ava about not marrying Mason. It made no sense and was stupid just to give conflict. The pining and dreaming of Ean was borderline obsessive and creepy; however, more than anything it was just sad, awkward and embarrassing for the reader.

 

3. Ean - beta hero that could be king of dullsville. There was no chemistry between Lacey and him. For being the smarty pants business owner he was supposed to be, he was hella dumb creeping around the cabin trying to see who was in there. Dude, that is your family's cabin and you have a key, just open the damn door! Spoiler -

when he made the grand decision to relocate part of his business to North Carolina to be with Lacey, I thought that was a cop out - he should have stayed in Boston. That way he and Lacey would have to work out a long-distance relationship and learn about each other, rather than rely on childhood crushes and feelings.

(spoiler show)

 

 

4. Ava was too over the top. Maybe because I saw how planning a wedding makes the bride and groom cranky and unhappy, I chose to go the courthouse route with my hubby (also, he went on a deployment the next day and I didn't feel like waiting until he got back to make arrangements....cause I am lazy like that :D). Honestly, Ava was such a brat, I had wished everyone RSVP'd No to her invitation. Also, Ava had some serious mood swings within a scene - happy, worried, rage, hugs. Every scene she was in was nothing but over produced drama.

 

5. The stupid story about the magical cottage and the constant use! of exclamation! points! in every! piece of dialogue! especially when females were talking! If I was Lacey's or Ava's neighbor, I would be calling the cops on them for disturbing the peace quite often. The over use of exclamation points also made them sound as if they were fourteen year olds; just incredibly childish.

 

6. Spoiler! That ending

....WTF? After all that obnoxious planning and drama queen scenes, Ava and Mason decide not to marry...but didn't tell anyone until one hour before the ceremony. So Lacey slips into being the bride and Ean assumes the role of groom as if it is the most natural thing to do after six weeks of dating. These same people who gave so much cautious advice to Ava, who dated Mason for two years. Horrible plot twist you could see a mile away. I had hopes she would bypass this crap, but nope. Also, you can get married in North Carolina without a marriage license if you take over for your best friend as bride!

(spoiler show)

ARRRRRGGGGGHHHHH!

 

 

Not going to read another book by this author. Waste of a day's reading time.

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