I hate it when people call books or authors pretentious. I'm just going to come out and say it. I hate it.

 

I completely respect it if people find certain books or authors unnecessarily convoluted or even condescending. I may not agree with them, but that's just fine. Some books do seem unnecessarily convoluted. Sometimes authors can come off as condescending. However, that doesn't mean that these books or authors ARE overly convoluted or condescending. As a reader, I think our opinions are incredibly valid and that we can feel or react to novels and authors in any way that we find fit as long as we recognize that our perception of anything is not necessarily the reality of that thing (and, of course, as long as we aren't careless and disrespectful with our views).

 

But back to my problem with calling a book (and anything or anyone, really) pretentious. When someone calls something pretentious, they are expressing the opinion that that thing is pretending to be smarter than it actually is, that it is pretending to be more impressive than it actually is. And how the heck does that person know (not just feel, but actually know) that that book/author/thing ISN'T as smart or impressive as it endeavours to be? Just because an individual isn't impressed with a particular book/author does not mean that book is any less intelligent and just because that book/author's form of intelligence doesn't mesh with that reader does not mean that the book/author must be pretending. 

 

I really don't think that we can ever accurately judge how smart anyone, particularly someone as distant as an author, is and saying that someone or something is pretentious is really the most pretentious thing anyone can do. (Inception: I have entered the horrible cycle of pretentiousness! Ahh!)

 

I also think it is incredibly disrespectful to say that an author is PRETENDING to be smart. There are thousands upon thousands of variations of intelligence and just because some types of intelligence don't ring true for certain readers doesn't mean that they are invalidated and thus pretentious. And I personally don't think that someone can convincingly pretend to be smarter than they actually are--if someone says something is pretending to be smart, they must on some level recognize that some form of intelligence exists in whatever they are criticizing and, in that case, the thing is just smart. No pretending involved.

 

What do you think? Does this piss you off too?

5/5; 5 stars; A+I originally got this book out of the library but liked it enough to buy a copy for my own reference library. My parenting section isn't that big...my self development section is though. You know why? In my opinion, to be a good parent, you need to work on yourself and try to fulfill your potential as a person. In Respectful Parent, Respectful Kids, the authors focus very much on understanding what makes us tick, why we feel and do the things we do. They give the reader a package of tools to help with that. The book is divided into three sections; 1) The Foundation for Respect and Co-Operation, 2) The 7 Keys to Co-operation, and 3) Family Activities and Stories from the No-Fault Zone.The things I really liked about this book are the emphasis on understanding your own thoughts and behaviours as well as your child's. About creating a safe and nurturing environment as opposed to one filled with rules/punishments/unknown minefields. I don't think a person will get the most out of this book if they are not willing to do the work. Like most things in self development/improvement, you can't just be 'told' how to make it happen, you have to reflect, examine, and put pencil to paper. This book could be used as a handbook for a workshop on parenting. The final third of the book is packed with activities designed to help the family work through the concepts. I focused mainly on the middle section, the 7 keys.

Working on my Spanish vocabulary.

Why: My friend heather said, ""I have read sooo many parenting books & I have to say that this has to be THE BEST & most infomative one I have found with real practical applications that can be immediately put to use in every day family life for any age child or adult."