I couldn't help but do another comparison today, just because I felt like looking at pictures of Robert Pattinson. I am being productive, seriously. 

Stephenie Meyer's Edward Cullen:

Fanfiction's: 

I like my Edward with a slice of badness. Which do you prefer?

You know, if Edward had simply allowed Bella to be crushed by Tyler's van in Chapter 3 ... I wouldn't have to read any more of this book. It would be over. 

Sounds like a fair trade-off to me. 

That's when I noticed the still, white figure. Edward Cullen was leaning against the front door of the Volvo, three cars down from me, and staring intently in my direction.

Guys, I want you to remember this update. These two sentences signify the moment that every book boyfriend became an epic, stalkery douchcanoe. 

After you're dead, that is.