This book is terrible. It hurts like a bitch in a very quiet, understated way, it does not have the grace of tying the themes in any of the expected or more hopeful ways, and does so in a excellently written way. "Beat me while I love you" much?... Feels like a meta-theme.

There are: parallels between the government and Kambili's father's tyranny, between her aunt dithering on leaving the country while urging her mother to leave her father, the friend's questions on what is to be done if the strong leave, the children as reasons for leaving, where to go as the mother asks.

There are: commentaries about privilege, and the amount of issues it conceals, about the difference between public and private image, about having for others to see but not enjoying, about compassion not being something deserved, or related to station.

There are: questions about internalized colonization, the way religion opens paths for oppression and culture erosion (I raged so hard at the baptism and confirmation names thing), how a nation's identity gets eaten.

The motto of a university being "to restore dignity", like dignity has been lost, and higher education is what "gives" it... I have so many issues with the pretentiousness of that motto even while I think education does empower a people.

There is frankly a lot, and it left me so sad.

The first tenth is a mastery of the ominous. There is no overt violence, but the atmosphere itself is violently oppressive, and you can feel how the silence was bred into this girl. There is a moment where Jaja talks about another girl that saw her father murdered just starting to talk after 4 months, and he says she'll never heal from that, and it stayed with me that none of this characters ever will. The mother drank the love sips and was grateful that there was no second wife. Jaja paid heartily for his inner guilt. Kambili still yearns for her father's approval in her dreams, and that's how terrible and binding this twisted mockery of love is. They still do not talk. But maybe they have some hope of laughter.

I'm not touching that other priest with a ten foot pole because she's freaking 15.

Words fail me. The tension is through the roofs. Can we address the deep, deep hypocrisy on this man condemning the militaristic coups?

Finally did a reread, still so damn good an important!!!!

***

Just like 'We Should All Be Feminists', this book is so damn important and everyone should read it.

I could've easily went through this book in one sitting in the span of a few minutes. But I didn't. I took my time and read every one of the suggestions and thought about them. I'm still thinking about them. I really wanted to soak up every word that Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie was writing, she has such a wonderful way with words and really gets the important message across.

I highlighted so many quotes that I just wanna reread a few times more (I'll probably end up reading the whole book a few times more, to be completely honest.)

There were elements I loved about this book, but an equal number of things that frustrated me. Let's start with the positives. The setting evoked a lot of nostalgia for me because I grew up in Enugu and holidayed in Nsukka, in the same university Kambili and Jaja stayed at, also roughly around the time the book was set. Adichie's description of the scenery and way of life was spot on and she perfectly captured the feelings I recall from back then. I always feel a sense of relief reading books where Nigerian culture and way of life is relayed so accurately, with no attempts to dumb down things for non African readers. Adichie never disappoints in that aspect (I highly recommend her other books for this reason and more). My frustration was with Kambili. I appreciate the fact that she was a shy and oppressed child who couldn't do much about her situation but, I just couldn't relate to her at all. She came across as weak, not just scared whilst her brother and cousins actually felt like they were real people who responded logically to the harsh realities of their lives. Everything was happening around her and she did very little to influence anything. Right up to the end, I kept waiting for her to use all the changes happening around her to snap out of her docile state but it never quite happened. I did, however, enjoy the story and how it unfolded, albeit at a pace that was too slow in places. A very emotive read.

Jessica Jones: Alias Vol. 2 - 4 stars

Jessica Jones: Alias Vol. 3 - 4.5 stars

Rat Queens, Vol. 1: Sass & Sorcery - 5 stars

salt. - 5 stars

Through the Woods - 5 stars

We Should All Be Feminists - 5 stars (reread)

The Sun and Her Flowers - 5 stars

Chase Darkness with Me: How One True-Crime Writer Started Solving Murders - 5 stars

Favorite book(s) of the month:

e v e r y t h i n g

Books started this month but haven't finished yet:

Still, Tote Asche, If I'm Being Honest, Just One of the Royals, Das Spiel

Random ramblings:

In the beginning of the month I felt a reading slump coming, so I did the only thing I could think of, ditched all the books I was currently reading and picked up some comics and poetry, and a tiny book I have already read before. And it worked. I went back to the other books after that and even though I didn't finish them, I actually got a good few pages read in them. So, I would say, I managed to avoid the reading slump.
I'm also now up to date on all the podcasts I listen to and have to wait for new episodes, so I actually have the time to pick up books LOL