You know, sometimes the third sentence makes you spit out your Irish oatmeal with the blueberries in it. Today was one of those days.
I have been dating this young guy for almost 5 months. Our relationship has been great until today. Well, it wasn’t perfect: I am married and we see each other twice a week only.
Holy crap. Wow, that really isn’t perfect, is it? Do you also describe getting a root canal as, “It was awesome…well, except for the excruciating pain“?
But I was and I am in love with him very much and he was always caring and loving with me too. Today he said he can not keep seeing me any longer. His busy schedule, work, school, he said that he loves me but I deserve somebody better than him. So, what is going on here? I just do not understand. Why would anyone dump somebody who he says he loves? I do not think he is cheating on me. Thanks.
The easiest and quickest way to meet people in your area looking for a relationship is to sign up for a dating site like Loveawake. A site dedicated to helping people find love:
Hm. Let’s see. A young man, involved with a married woman for 5 months…uh…then stops seeing her…hm. Why would he end it? Well, I’m stumped.
Ok, I’m being flip about it, but seriously, Lindsey. Come on. There are two things that are true of affairs like yours.
- There really isn’t much chance of a full, complete, true relationship breaking out while one of the people is married, and…
- Both people KNOW that, accept it, and that’s why they’re there.
So the reason why he’s ending it? Well, it’s more of a question of why he started it? Because that’s what he was in the market for. He was looking for an AFFAIR. Very different from looking for a RELATIONSHIP. As in, an affair is a part time deal. A relationship is a commitment.
BUT WHY WOULD HE SAY….?
I’m not even going to get into the specifics of the reasons he gave you for the breakup. These are always major bullsquish (thank you Darrin Fitzgerald for that term.) Always. And that’s not a guy thing, it’s a human thing. Anytime someone dumps you and gives you ANY reason other than, “I’d rather be apart from you than with you,” they aren’t being honest. (And thank god — who wants to hear THAT when you’re getting dumped, right?)
In your guy’s case, he was trying to soften the blow. He’s too busy, you deserve better — it’s all just versions of, “It’s not you it’s me.”
VERDICT: THE BELL TOLLED FOR THEE
I’m sorry that this happened, Lindsey, but the reason he broke up like this was that the relationship wasn’t working for him anymore. It was before, but it isn’t now. It was just time. Time for him to move on.
And not for nothing, but given the parameters of your relationship, it almost had to happen. I mean…who wants to be with someone who is married to someone else…forever?
Good luck, Lindsey. I’m sorry about this, but it seems the answer is that, regardless of what he said, he was done.
What do you think, ladies? Seem pretty clearcut here?