Still cleaning up my database one old review at a time.

I’ve given this series three tries now. That’s three tries too many and two more than usual. I have been disappointed for the final time. I Am Done. Done with the stagnant, shallow, and (in Ever’s case) stubbornly dense characters. Done with the New Age nattering on about energy fields and Wicca 101 lessons. Done with the endless faux sexual tension and the strung out destined to be together soul-mate crap. 

I should probably have some wine and chocolate and calm the hell down but I need to get this review over and done so I can move on and purge it from my memory which fortunately for me (in this case) isn’t very good anyway.

If you haven’t read the previous books in the series they are Evermore and Blue Moon and you really haven’t missed much. I’ll do a super quick synopsis to spare you from the unnecessarily long brain melting info. dump that goes on in the first few chapters of Shadowland. Ever is a pretty blonde cheerleader type who lost her entire family in an accident. But don’t fret because she doesn’t. She’s too busy mooning over dreamy guys. In Evermore she was made an immortal by drinking “immortal juice” given to her by her perfect, gorgeous, immortal boyfriend and soul mate Damen. They want to have sex (oh so very bad) but can’t touch because braniac Ever trusted a villain named Roman in Blue Moon and now her body fluids are toxic to Damen. They can’t kiss or bump any naked naughty bits or do anything else unless fully covered and there’s really no fun in that now, is there? They can’t even hold hands because Ever might get all clammy and sweat on him causing his ultimate fiery demise. Ahhh, the tragedy! So there you go. 

In Shadowland, they attempt to find an antidote so they can finally “be together” (euphemism courtesy of the author, I would’ve used much naughtier terms), Ever doesn’t listen (again) and gets herself into further trouble and then a new character named Jude (who is gorgeous and dreadlocked and gets Ever all a-flutter, shameless hussy that she is) is introduced because what the world needs now is another lame love triangle.

If I sound a mite sarcastic I’m sorry but I’m beyond irritated by these shallow and dimension-less characters. I had all three of these books on my Ipod and kept reading them hoping desperately that things would improve. But Damen is still totally amazing and crapping out white tulips and we are continually brutalized with Ever’s endless descriptions of his physical perfection. At one point she even waxes poetic about his “perfect rubber flip flop shod feet”. I Kid You Not. Oh and Haven is still a royal beeyatch while Ever continues to be Ever. No one grows at all in these books and it makes me crazy. 

But the worst fault here is that Shadowland blathers on for chapters without anything much of any excitement, importance or plot advancement happening. I could deal with this if I were enjoying even one of the characters but they continually disappointed and frustrated me with their perfection, self-centeredness or outright stupidity. And then the bit about Haven becoming . . . well, I won’t go there and spoil things for you in case you’re still wanting to read it.

I realize I’m rambling but this series is just not a good one, if you’re asking me. It’s not interesting, the characters are mostly jerks who I can’t work up any sympathy for and it’s not one I can recommend at all. I’m stopping here even though I think I still have two more of these books on my Ipod. I’ve already wasted too much time and if someone tells me they get better I am sticking my fingers in my ears and refusing to listen. Which is what I wish I had done with these audiobooks!

I’ve given this series three tries now. That’s three tries too many and two more than usual. I have been disappointed for the final time. I Am Done. Done with the stagnant, shallow, and (in Ever’s case) stubbornly dense characters. Done with the New Age nattering on about energy fields and Wicca 101 lessons. Done with the endless faux sexual tension and the strung out destined to be together soul-mate crap.

I should probably have some wine and chocolate and calm the hell down but I need to get this review over and done so I can move on and purge it from my memory which fortunately for me (in this case) isn’t very good anyway.

If you haven’t read the previous books in the series they are Evermore and Blue Moon and you really haven’t missed much. I’ll do a super quick synopsis to spare you from the unnecessarily long brain melting info. dump that goes on in the first few chapters of Shadowland. Ever is a pretty blonde cheerleader type who lost her entire family in an accident. But don’t fret because she doesn’t. She’s too busy mooning over dreamy guys. In Evermore she was made an immortal by drinking “immortal juice” given to her by her perfect, gorgeous, immortal boyfriend and soul mate Damen. They want to have sex (oh so very bad) but can’t touch because braniac Ever trusted a villain named Roman in Blue Moon and now her body fluids are toxic to Damen. They can’t kiss or bump any naked naughty bits or do anything else unless fully covered and there’s really no fun in that now, is there? They can’t even hold hands because Ever might get all clammy and sweat on him causing his ultimate fiery demise. Ahhh, the tragedy! So there you go.

In Shadowland, they attempt to find an antidote so they can finally “be together” (euphemism courtesy of the author, I would’ve used much naughtier terms), Ever doesn’t listen (again) and gets herself into further trouble and then a new character named Jude (who is gorgeous and dreadlocked and gets Ever all a-flutter, shameless hussy that she is) is introduced because what the world needs now is another lame love triangle.

If I sound a mite sarcastic I’m sorry but I’m beyond irritated by these shallow and dimension-less characters. I had all three of these books on my Ipod and kept reading them hoping desperately that things would improve. But Damen is still totally amazing and crapping out white tulips and we are continually brutalized with Ever’s endless descriptions of his physical perfection. At one point she even waxes poetic about his “perfect rubber flip flop shod feet”. I Kid You Not. Oh and Haven is still a royal beeyatch while Ever continues to be Ever. No one grows at all in these books and it makes me crazy.

But the worst fault here is that Shadowland blathers on for chapters without anything much of any excitement, importance or plot advancement happening. I could deal with this if I were enjoying even one of the characters but they continually disappointed and frustrated me with their perfection, self-centeredness or outright stupidity. And then the bit about Haven becoming . . . well, I won’t go there and spoil things for you in case you’re still wanting to read it.

I realize I’m rambling but this series is just not a good one, if you’re asking me. It’s not interesting, the characters are mostly jerks who I can’t work up any sympathy for and it’s not one I can recommend at all. I’m stopping here even though I think I still have two more of these books on my Ipod. I’ve already wasted too much time and if someone tells me they get better I am sticking my fingers in my ears and refusing to listen! Which is what I wish I had done with these audiobooks!

Why does every other book I pick up have to be part of some ongoing (sometimes never ending) series? Why can’t a book stand alone?  Why do I ask stupid questions when I already know the answer?  I am crabby and all I want is a fantastic standalone romance novel and I can’t seem to find one this month. Is this too much to ask?! 

So, here’s my story of woe. I reserved this from the library via the internet without knowing it was book #2 in a series.  When I picked it up and realized my error (which is clearly stated on the front for any idiot to see), I was too lazy to go back to return it and figured I’d give it a go anyway. Nora Roberts is usually an author I can count on.  My mistake. I should’ve wasted the gas and the time and turned back. Instead I wasted 10+ hours of my time insisting to myself this book would get better. It didn’t. I think this idiot has finally learned her lesson.

The entire first hour of this unabridged audiobook is spent introducing three siblings in Ireland with magical powers who are battling some evil do-er who murdered their parents. I thought the book was going to be about one of them since Roberts spent so much time with the intro’s and all and just as I was feeling bad for them and getting comfy with the storyline she zips us to the future. Here we meet another group of three with magical powers who are related to the previous three.  What. The. Hey?

Somewhere around hour three (yes, hour three people, you can't call me a quitter!) I am finally clued in to the fact that this may be a romance and the hero is this nice, friendly Connor fellow and I’m good with that. He has magical powers, trains falcons and is content with his happy life. He loves his siblings/cousins and has a friendly outlook on life.  The heroine is Meara, his childhood friend who he enjoys teasing and touching whenever he can. She leads horse tours. She doesn’t have the magical powers but she does have an affinity for the horses. She’s nice enough. Together they’re fine but I didn’t feel much of anything but perhaps it’s because I’m dead inside.

So, there is a romance happening but it didn’t thrill me all that much and felt more like a secondary plot element. I'd be sad if I weren't so bored.And cold-hearted.

What is going on is kind of crazy, convoluted and not very original. There is a Big Bad who escaped from a Charmed episode or the past or some such who keeps popping up to steal “the three’s” (or "The Trees" as the narrator says) magical powers. Or something. The six main characters spend a lot of moaning and groaning about how to vanquish the evil do-er. They perform some Wiccan ceremonies which never seem to pan out in their favor. It all felt really campy to me and not in the fun kind of campy way.

I will admit that I may easily have missed some heartwarming and/or genuinely terrifying moments because the narrator read the book Fecking Terribly. He had a nice enough Irish accent but his American accent was atrocious and he seemed to fade in and out of it. He read the book instead of performing it and paused at inappropriate places. But the worst thing was that he made all of the characters sound almost exactly the same. I never quite knew who was speaking and the book felt as if it were 100 hours long and I feared it would never end and that this was my own private hell.

If you are following this series, do yourself a favor and skip this audio version. Find it at your library or buy the paperback or suffer like I did.