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review 2017-08-05 15:06
This book is both infuriating and uplifting...
The First Time She Drowned - Kerry Kletter



Book Title:  The First Time She Drowned

Author:  Kerry Kletter

Narration:  Jorjeanna Marie

Genre:  YA, Realistic Fiction 

Source:  Audiobook (Library)




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Ratings Breakdown


Plot:  4.5/5

Main Characters:  4/5

Secondary Characters:  4/5

The Feels:  5/5

Addictiveness:  4/5

Theme or Tone:  4.2/5

Flow (Writing Style):  4.2/5

Backdrop (World Building):  4/5

Book Cover:  5/5

Narration:  4.5/5

Ending:  5/5  Cliffhanger:  Nope

Total:  4.3/5 STARS






My Thoughts


I've been reading this type of book a lot lately and I have say that this one has a completely different feel to it, not bad, just different.  The narrator, Cassie, is very subdued, like she doesn't allow herself to truly feel, and ultimately the story feels both authentic and implausible at the same time.  My feelings though, were all over the place, I was kind of spastic, even.  I wanted to yell at this girl so many times, and especially her mother.  Her Dad is no winner either, because he basically enables the mother.  This is one kid badly in need of someone to actually listen to her.  This book really made me appreciate having a loving, normal mother, even if she was taken from me too soon.  How anyone can be so fucked in head and still be allowed to breed, is just unfathomable, because loving your kid is suppose to be the easy part.


Will I read more from this Author⇜ I would.


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text 2017-08-03 23:59
July Recap
Rebound: A Boomerang Novel - Noelle August
The Breakup Support Group - Cheyanne Young
A Court of Thorns and Roses - Sarah J. Maas
Follow Me Down: A Novel - Sherri L. Smith
Stalking Jack the Ripper - Kerri Maniscalco
Ferocious (Vicarious) - Paula Stokes
The First Time She Drowned - Kerry Kletter
Bad Blood (The Naturals #4) ((The Naturals #4)) - Jennifer Lynn Barnes
Follow Me Back - A.V. Geiger

I finished a much loved series this month...The Naturals.  with the final book in the 4 book series, Bad Blood...loved it, btw.  I also really enjoyed the conclusion to Vicarious Duo, with Ferocious, which I received an ARC of.


I also finished up a few reading challenges, 3 of them this month, actually.  A few of the books I've read this month were read just for this purpose.  Like the Breakup Support Group, Stalking Jack The Ripper and The First Time She Drowned.  I'm actively trying to start less of these so I can finish some of the super long ones.





(Audiobook) Rebound by Noelle August

Finish Date:  07/02



(Kindle eBook) The Breakup Support Group by Cheyanne Young

Finish Date:  07/07



(Audiobook) A Court of Thorns and Roses by Sarah J Maas

Finish Date:  07/11



(e-ARC) Follow Me Down by Sherri Smith

Finish Date:  07/13



(Audiobook) Stalking Jack The Ripper by Kerri Manisculco

Finish Date:  07/20



(e-ARC) Ferocious by Paula Stokes

Finish Date:  07/24



(Audiobook) The First Time She Drowned by Kerry Kletter

Finish Date:  07/26



(eBook) Bad Blood by Jennifer Lynn Barnes

Finish Date:  07/30



(Audiobook) Follow Me Back by AV Geiger

Finish Date:  07/31




9 Books Total 3,181 Pages (including Audio's)

5 Audiobooks, 2 eBooks, and 2 Netgalley e-ARC's









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text 2016-05-12 00:11
May (e) book haul
A Murder in Time: A Novel - Julie McElwain
Sleeping Giants - Sylvain Neuvel
The Star-Touched Queen - Roshani Chokshi
The Square Root of Summer - Harriet Reuter Hapgood
Don't You Cry - Mary Kubica
And I Darken - Kiersten White
The First Time She Drowned - Kerry Kletter
The Man in the High Castle - -Brilliance Audio on CD Unabridged-,Jeff Cummings,Philip K. Dick

Lots of new purchases this month guys!

A Murder in Time: A Novel - Julie McElwain 

Sleeping Giants - Sylvain Neuvel 

The Star-Touched Queen - Roshani Chokshi 

The Square Root of Summer - Harriet Reuter Hapgood 

The First Time She Drowned - Kerry Kletter 


And a couple of netgalley titles:

Don't You Cry - Mary Kubica 

And I Darken - Kiersten White 


Currently Reading Updates:

I finally watched the series "The man in the high castle" and it was really good. Naturally, I got both the book and the audio. I'm at the beginning but there are so many differences already.

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review 2016-04-22 05:33
The First Time She Drowned
The First Time She Drowned - Kerry Kletter
Narrator: Jorjeana Marie 
Publisher: Listening Library
Publication Date: 3/15/2016 
Format: Audio
My Rating: 5 Stars  
Kerry Kletter delivers a powerful contemporary debut--an emotionally haunting tale of darkness and light, THE FIRST TIME SHE DROWNED hypnotic, deftly combining lyrical prose with heartrending subjects--an exploration into the complexities of family, mental illness, abuse, and depression.

Things have not been easy for Cassie O’Malley. Since birth she knows something is not quite right. She tries desperately to seek her mom’s love. An absentee father, and a brother her mom seems to love. Cassie is invisible to her mom. What is wrong between mother and daughter?

Two and half years earlier Cassie’s mom dumped her in a mental institution. At age eighteen, Cassie is able to start her life once again. However, with psychological damage, is she able to start anew, until she uncovers the trauma of her past, she has buried deep inside for protection?

Will the darkness pull her under once again, or will she be strong enough to face her past? Why wouldn’t her mother believe her? Who can she count on?

Once she leaves the institute, she has more issues to face. Slowly the past abuse comes in bits and pieces with the help of therapist. Her past has defined her. The deep rooted fissures in the O’Malley family come to the surface. She has to face the past, memories--love herself, in order to move forward.

Powerfully written, Kletter follows one young woman's journey through heartbreak and loss to courage and resolve, as she searches for the truth.

Superbly crafted combined with suspenseful narrative, THE FIRST TIME SHE DROWNED is a gripping, harrowing study of a troubled mother and daughter relationship, from a remarkable new storyteller.

For fans of Jodi Picoult, T. Greenwood, Julie Buxbaum, and Rochelle B. Weinstein, as well as the YA and adult domestic suspense readers. I listened to the audio book, narrated byJorjeana Marie delivering a spellbinding performance!

If this is a debut, can't wait to see what follows, from this talented author.
Source: www.judithdcollinsconsulting.com/#!The-First-Time-She-Drowned/cmoa/571199200cf2af49d712523c
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review 2016-04-21 19:37
The First Time She Drowned
The First Time She Drowned - Kerry Kletter

This novel wasn’t exactly what I thought it was going to be.   It seemed like such a huge novel for the one strong message that I received from it but I enjoyed it.   I thought Cass put up with a lot of crap growing up and although her mother washed her hands of her, I don’t want to say that was a good thing but I would hate to think what might have happened had she not.   I hate to play the “what if” game and especially in these circumstances but as Cass was flashing back to her childhood, had her mother kept her under her wings what might have happened to Cass? I can only hope that Cass might have ran away and she would have lived happily ever after but who knows, all I know is what is printed in front of me in this novel.  Cass’ life sucked all around, plainly putting it, right out there for you. Later in life, it starts to turn around and Cass finds her voice.


We find Cass in a mental institution where her mother signed her in.   Cass thought at first that her parents would be back shortly but it’s been 2.5 years and she’s finally turned eighteen and ready to sign herself out. She will miss James and I will miss him too, as his humor inside the walls of this psychiatric hospital made the days go faster. His responses in group therapy had me laughing as he told about being raised as a blueberry by carrot-colored midgets or the time that he constantly was teased because he had a brightly colored red nose. This is definitely the type of individual that I would want to know inside a mental institution. They will be together again, James tells her as he plans on meeting her outside the institution walls someday.


Outside on her own, it’s the freedom Cass has always wanted but the freedom that she has never experienced and doesn’t know how to handle. Cass’ mom now has suddenly taken an interest in her life since she is released and has her admitted to her alma mater. Why this sudden interest? Cass makes her way to college, alone and with no support system. This is a dangerous situation yet Cass tries the best that she can. There are successes and there are failures for her but not the ones that typically come with the first weeks of college. If only I could reach inside the book and offer a helping hand, some words of wisdom or phone someone for her but I am helpless. Cass drowns but she surfaces to face another day and again, I want so badly to help her as she struggles in her new life.   Then she finds Zoey, I thought at first wow, of all people she meets and she meets Zoey. But there is something about Zoey, she’s real, she creates these moments that I wanted to scream “yes! That it!” At first Cass doesn’t know what to think about Zoey and I am glad she felt the same way I did, but later she gave Zoey a chance. Between the moments that Cass is at college and the moments she is flashing back to her childhood, I see the big picture.   She is a product, a product of her upbringing. We all are but Cass finally sees it and she’s ready for the next step. I really enjoyed the ending and I won’t spoil it but telling you why but I feel that some readers might not enjoy it.

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