Engulfed by the darkness,
I lost my way.
Thinking about the past,
I lost sight of the present.
My vision blurred by the tears,
I forgot to see the light.
As if my throat just closed up,
I forgot to ask for help.
But I was wrong to have despaired,
It wasn’t the end of my story.
It was only a sad chapter,
Until I remembered to turn the page.
Oh, the things we do for love,
And the dreams that can never be.
Oh, the lies we tell ourselves,
And the nights we cry until falling asleep.
If love is so painful is it even worth it?
Then, if not love what else there is to live for?
Shackled by the bonds of our love,
None of us can ever be truly free.
It's something we crave and welcome,
Even if it breaks our heat in the end,
Love is something we'll always want to feel.
For love, we'll do despicable things,
And then will tell ourselves that,
All is fair in love and war.
We claim that the love we seek has higher purpose,
Telling ourselves that we accept wrong to be right.
Oh, the things we do for our love,
And the lies we tell ourselves!
© 2019, Fizza Younis. All Rights Reserved.
When I think of death, I feel alive
Death isn't something to be afraid of
It's something inevitable and fighting it is futile
Thinking about it is a little strange at my age
But not thinking about it would be even stranger
Because when has death cared about the years
It can come to anyone at any time
We must be vigilant and stay prepared
Don't let it surprise you
Don't let it deprive you of the joys of your life
It is inevitable, that much is true
It is the unknown, fearing it may seem natural
But when you live the way you have
How bad could death really be?
It might even be better
Death is your friend, only if you'd see
Surrender to it and it will take care of you
Go willingly and it will lead you to someplace safe
Don't make a fuss
Life has no right to be better than death
It's just the other side of the same coin
Death is a beauty, nothing to fear
Some even wait for it to appear
Some hope it comes sooner, to some of us
It is very, very dear!
© 2019, Fizza Younis. All Rights Reserved.
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Vivian Gornick's book on the art of essay writing was bound to get good marks from me, if only for its extensive drawing of examples from famous books and essays.
Criticism — as compared to reviews — is a singularly rewarding experience, especially in the hands of a good writer such as Gornick. It can open your eyes to a new way of seeing a piece you have already read or turn you on to writers you have never experienced. In the course of this book I was turned on to Seymour Krim, I reopened an essay by Joan Didion, and I've hunted down a PDF of Edward Hoagland's "The Courage of Turtles."
The point is theoretically to help in the writing of essays, but I was delighted to discover that what drew me in was perhaps the point all along. Gornick does not reveal until the conclusion her suspicion of studying "craft" (as it were) and the idea that one can teach writing at all. It's not how to write but how to read, critically and with an eye toward story, that drives The Situation and the Story. Gornick is asking the reader to dig deeper, discover what it is about Orwell's "Shooting an Elephant" that makes it compelling.
"Who is speaking, what is being said and what is the relation between the two," is a repeated admonition as you read into a story. Orwell going out and shooting an elephant could be an act of bravado, it could be an act of cruelty, but in the way he writes it is an exploration of colonialism. What it means to represent a ruling nation among a people who aren't keen to have you there, and especially when you're not too keen on the idea either. What does that position do to someone? This comes through in his voice, in the way he describes "the situation" as much as in the actions he takes. Asking these questions will make such readings more enjoyable and meaningful, but should also inform your own work.
The crux of this lies in a story about one of who students writing an essay about her grandfather — a man she has never met. The story isn't quite working until someone realizes that her learning about her grandfather is the situation, it provides a structure for the story, the actions on which the writer can hang meaning. The story, the meaning itself, is actually about the girl connecting with the grandmother. From there the essay starts to come together in a more satisfying way.
I am not convinced with all of Gornick's stances, her belief in the inborn gift of writing skill is maybe just said wrong or maybe it is magical thinking. And the way her distaste for post-modernism is slipped in does not serve any end except to let you know she is not a fan. But if you are interested in personal writing, either to write or read, this is a good place to start.
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