"To me, the concern over the state of black hair is so ingrained in society, so ingrained in black people's DNA that it, in some ways, defines who we, I'm using the black we here, are to people and subsequently to ourselves. Kind of like how there is Career Girl Barbie, Aerobics Instructor Barbie, and Army Medic Barbie, there is Professional Black Hair (straight uncooked linguine), Makes-Her-Own-Incense Black Hair (dreadlocks or twists), and Super-into-Malcolm-X Black Hair (Afros, duh), just to name a few. The point is that we are aware that how our hair is styled determines how we will be treated by others, and that treatment or mistreatment (for example, the word angry doesn't get hurled at me nearly as much when my hair is straight as when it's in an Afro) can affect our own opinions of ourselves. But this isn't always the case. Some black people haven't been lucky enough to be exposed to differing outside perspectives of black hair and as a result the loudest perspective—the one that says black hair = bad—is often what reigns supreme in their minds. We black girls are conditioned from a young age to treat our natural hair as a problem that needs to be remedied, that we need to have that "good hair," meaning hair that, in its natural state, is not difficult to comb through."
There's just so much to unpack in that paragraph... I can empathize with spending so much time thinking about, analyzing, and defending an attribute that it becomes part of your identity.