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review 2017-02-14 13:15
The Haunted Vagina
The Haunted Vagina - Carlton Mellick III

So this was... bizarre, odd, insane, and very entertaining. I couldn't put it down, and believe me, there were times when I wanted to. I really wanted to. For years to come I will say, "I once read a book where a man climbed into his girlfriend's rubbery vagina and fell in love."

 

I am sure a lot of people could find "hidden" symbolism in this, but for me it was just a book to read that made my jaw drop and hang open. 

 

Will I read more bizarro, I like that word, fiction? I may at some point, but for now this one was enough. 

 

A perfect, quick read if you want to have a lot of "huh!?" moments. The writer is good at what he does. 

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review 2016-12-02 19:08
Tijuana Donkey Showdown by Adam Howe
Tijuana Donkey Showdown - Adam Howe

 

This is one of the funniest books I've read in my entire life. 

 

Reggie Levine is the likable bouncer at The Henhouse and just wants to disappear into the men's room with his magazine and do his business. Unfortunately, he's unable to do that. Local used car guru Harry is busy getting his head dunked in the only toilet bowl available and it's making a damn mess. So begins Tijuana Donkey Showdown. 

 

Off the top of my head this story features:  an extremely well endowed drug mule, (and when I say mule, I mean a jackass and when I say well endowed I mean WELL endowed), a circus strongman, a sexy veterinarian, a gas station/zoo, (WTF??), a Chinese Crested Terrier that likes to hump legs, an overweight stripper and, (wait for it)....Nic Cage. (That's right, he spells it Nic. Supposedly, what do I know?)

 

I laughed out loud for most of the time I was reading this book. My husband thought I was nuts last night, and my coworkers thought the same, just now at lunch. When I thought things could not go more over the top, they did just that. (Literally, dangling from a giant inflatable used car guy balloon.)

 

This story was fast paced and in your face! I recommend it to fans of down and dirty stories that leave no holds barred. You might be offended, you might think it's disgusting, but I guarantee you this-you WILL be laughing. Well done, Mr. Howe! Well done!

 

You can get your copy here: Tijuana Donkey Showdown

 

*I received a complimentary copy of this book in exchange for my honest feedback. This is it.*

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review 2016-10-01 16:46
Przypadek? Nie sądzę; przypuszczam, że wątpię
Przypadek Alicji - Aleksandra Zielińska

W różnych miejscach internetu można wyczytać, jak w jednym zdaniu wymienia się pisarzy takich jak Szczepan Twardoch, Łukasz Orbitowski, Jakub Małecki i Aleksandra Zielińska. Powstaje pytanie, czy w związku z tym pisarka jest tak dobra, jak pozostali? Na pierwszy ogień poszła książka Przypadek Alicji, po której... ani o krok nie jestem bliższy odpowiedzi.

 

Gatunkowo, jak ktoś mocno potrzebuje, może Przypadek włożyć między horrory. A konkretniej bizarro, taka dziwna dziwność, nagłe przejścia z realizmu w fantazję często w dość obrzydliwy - celowo, rzecz jasna - sposób. Szkoda tylko, że niektóre bizarro-motywy tu zastosowane są dość ograne, wyszło parę książek w tym gatunku, jakieś antologie nawet, i tu niektóre zagrywki nie zaskakują, bo są znane.

 

Książka opowiada o Alicji, która zachodzi w ciążę. Nie chce dziecka, zatem póki jest czas, próbuje działać. Jednak z każdym krokiem natrafia na sytuacje coraz bardziej nierealne, często wyjęte prosto z Alicji w Krainie Czarów, jednak dopasowane do reguł gatunku. Sytuacje przeżywamy razem z nią, i niektórzy czytelnicy pewnie znajdą przyjemność w dopasowaniu wydarzeń do tych ze wspomnianej książki, a także innych dóbr kultury. Nieźle pokazane jest także życie młodej dziewczyny w dzisiejszej Polsce, świat przedstawiony jest niefajny sam z siebie, a z tego rodzaju podejściem do życia, jakie ma bohaterka, staje się momentami nie do zniesienia.

 

Na całe szczęście nie jest Przypadek Alicji jedynie zbiorem kolejnych okropieństw i innych przygód, autorka stara się na końcu pokazać coś ważniejszego, kieruje powieść w stronę ważniejszych tematów i problemów. Książkę uważam za niezłą, ale raczej szybko o niej zapomnę, z nóg mnie nie zwaliła. Ale i nie odrzuciła, myślę, że z czasem sięgnę po kolejne pozycje pani Zielińskiej.

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review 2016-08-05 20:20
Year's Best Hardcore Horror Volume 1, ed. by Randy Chandler & Cherly Mullenax, narrated by Joe Hempel
Year's Best Hardcore Horror, Volume 1 - Comet Press,Jack Bantry,Joe Hempel,Kristopher Triana,Adam Cesare,Clare de Lune,Adam Howe,Robert Essig,David James Keaton,Cheryl Mullenax,Monica J. O'Rourke,Jeff Strand,Randy Chandler

 Normally, I'm more of an atmospheric horror gal than a gore lover, however, I do believe there's room for both in the horror genre of today. I picked up this volume when it first came out, but it was the offer of the free audio, (in exchange for my honest review), that made it possible for me to read it now rather than some time in 2017. This was my first book narrated by Joe Hempel and I think he did a fine job, especially considering the often shocking subject matter.

 

 

There were a few "new to me" authors here and my favorite among them was The Behrg and his story, Reborn. THIS, this is the reason people don't leave babies on the steps of churches anymore. Reborn is my favorite type of short horror story-no messing around, BAM!! It hits you right in the face! The Behrg has been on my radar for awhile and now I have to finally acknowledge him. (You were right, Kimberly!)

 

The Most Important Miracle by Scott Emerson. Now, seriously, who the hell is this guy? From what kind of sick brain did this story emerge? More importantly, are there more stories in there?

 

There were a couple of tales from authors I am already familiar with that I really liked-Adam Howe's Cleanup On Aisle 3 was one of them. It's a BADASS turning of the tables type story that had me cringing and laughing at the same time.

 

Jeff Strand's contribution,  Awakening,   had me laughing so hard I almost fell out of my chair. Rarely are suicide pacts THIS funny!

 

Lastly, Jason Parent's Eleanor knocked my socks off. Boot-i-ful?? Yep, you bet! Sick, twisted and beautiful.

 

Overall, this was an above average collection that lost nothing in the translation to audio. Most of these tales are brutal, gory and shocking though, so prepare yourself before you go wading in. It gets deep and rather slimy the further you go.

 

Highly recommended to fans of hardcore horror!

 

*Thanks to Joe Hempel and Audiobook BOOM! for the free copy in exchange for my honest review.*

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review 2016-07-11 10:11
My Little Children review
My Little Children: Four Stories Unsettling, Surreal and Horrific - Keith Deininger

Odd. That's my one word description of these four unsettling, mostly supernatural tales which are low on concrete answers and high on sub-text.

Keith Deininger is a unique voice within the dark fiction/horror world and these tales are no exception. None of them really grabbed me, however, and delivered that gut punch I always hope for with any short story. All, however, are very readable and provoke deeper thought.

At 42 pages - with half the Kindle version I read dedicated to an excerpt from another Deininger novel, Ghosts of Eden - it's a very brief investment of time, and one worth it for fans of dark tales that come bereft of a neat little bow to go round them.

3 Reasons Not to go Out Clubbing for My Little Chidlren.

Source: www.goodreads.com/review/show/1201271337
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