...textured, complex, filled with bursts of intense flavour that nevertheless catch you by surprise, easy to eat, satisfying but still leaving you wanting more.
Here's an example of one of the surprises.
Mr Hopkins, a museum curator, has been murdered using one of his exhibits as the murder weapon. He is so annoyed by the damage caused to the exhibit by being used in this way that he refuses to acknowledge his own demise even with DEATH standing next to him. When he finally accepts his own incorporeality, he complains to death, saying:
"This really is most uncalled-for. Couldn't you have arranged a less awkward time?
ONLY BY CONSULTING WITH YOUR MURDERER
It all seems very badly organised. I wish to make a complaint. I pay my taxes, after all.
I AM DEATH, NOT TAXES. I TURN UP ONLY ONCE."
The shade of Mr Hopkins began to fade.
"It's simply that I've always tried to plan ahead in a sensible way...
I'VE FOUND THE BEST APPROACH IS TO TAKE LIFE AS IT COMES
That seems very irresponsible...
IT'S ALWAYS WORKED FOR ME"
This small slice of fruitcake is so rich it's worthy of Bettys Tea Shop in Harrogate. It deserves to be savoured, perhaps with a good slice of Wensleydale and a cafeterier of coffee. It certainly made my morning better.