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review 2019-01-02 04:47
Twisted, Fun and even Educational
P Is for Pterodactyl: The Worst Alphabet Book Ever - Raj Haldar,Chris Carpenter

One of the first books printed in the American colonies was The New England Primer, filled with catchy lines like "In Adam's Fall / We Sinned All."

 

Since that time, many alphabet-type books have been published in the same -- or similar -- vein. One of the latest is P Is for Pterodactyl, which carries the subtitle, The Worst Alphabet Book Ever which doesn't seem that complimentary, but when it includes lines like:

" is for Jai Alai.

or

" is for Ewe."

or even

U is not for You.

and maybe you start to think there's a little truth in advertising.

 

It's actually an amusing book with some examples of the oddities and vagaries of English spelling/pronunciation that will stick with you. I'm not crazy about some of the selections (V's a good example), but by and large, I really liked each "for" that the authors selected.

The artwork is great -- it compliments the text well and will help keep shorter attention spans focused.

 

For everyone who enjoyed BNL's "Crazy ABC's", this Picture Book entertains as well as educates. I'm not sure how well it'd work for the 7-and-under crowd, but for older elementary kids -- and adults who just want a chuckle, this book will be just the ticket. I had a fun time reading it -- as did my whole family. Unlike most of the picture books I post about here, you'll note tat this one doesn't carry any kind of disclaimer -- I bought this one after seeing a couple of pieces about it online, and am glad I did. I imagine you will be, too.

Source: irresponsiblereader.com/2019/01/01/p-is-for-pterodactyl-the-worst-alphabet-book-ever-by-raj-haldar-chris-carpenter-maria-beddia-twisted-fun-and-even-educational
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text 2017-03-07 06:53
The Worst Werewolf (The Immutable Moon B... The Worst Werewolf (The Immutable Moon Book 1) - Jacqueline Rohrbach
Me to you: So I’ve finished this book and I’m like, how do I review this? Like, seriously, how?! Help. Me.
 
 
Okay. I’m calmer now. The first part I’m down with. Cute but unassuming hot gay nerd who doesn’t know he’s a cutie is seeking online guy who might be okay.gif online dating profileMaybe he won’t be one of those dating horror stories. Maybe he’ll kinda resemble his profile, the rarest of the rare. Garvey turns up and he IS as hot as his profile pic~ so ominous. Tovin should have known it was the Twilight Zone as soon as he met Garvey. But they go to bar trivia where Tovin considers it winning when two hot women are there and the local guys with patchy facial hair are checking them out, which means the guys will BS for weeks how they “scored” with the hot women, as if, and forget about Tovin for a change.
 .
.
 
Me to Tovin:  Hot guy who matches his profile? Hot women who’ll take the heat off you? Gawd, hon. RUN! Too many planets are lining up. Say you’re going to reapply your CoverGirl Lippy and jump out the bathroom window!!
 ,
,
Of course no one listens to me, so Tovin ends up in the woods, and it’s baaaad. He’s set upon by ants and bugs GIF I HATE NATUREand rocks, horrid things nature throws at you. Here’s one more tip from the LeeBeMe handbook~ don’t go into nature. Nothing good EVER comes from that. Three strikes: Profile pic matching and he’s built, women to take the hick’s minds of you, and a guy who wants to fuck in the woods. If he’s a catch he’ll find a room, maybe a bed. I hate to be picky but comfort and no bugs up your anus counts gazillions. Trust me. It gets worse when Garvey tells Tovin that the dogs howling in the background are really werewolves, that he’s a werewolf, that Tovin’s going to be a bloodslave for a werewolf. Da hell you say?! Online dating can be tricky if you’re unprepared. If he’d listened to me he’d have run, not to be a bitch and all, just sayin’.
 
 
Lots of lolz in the beginning but shit gets real after that and this is the part where it gets harder to review. Garvey is doing what he’s doing because he’s seen that his wolves, the lesser kind, are going to be culled by other wolves unless he does something. He doesn’t share this info with everyone, his kidnapping teammates aren’t even in the know. He takes Tovin into the woods to mess him up so that he won’t be wanted to present as a bloodslave to an Alpha guardian wolf named Lavario. Lavario’s part of the Varcolac pack but he isn’t Varcolac. He’s from the Isangelous pack, long story, and the leader of the Varcolac pack hates him. But Eresna, Alpha of the Isangelous pack, has plans of her own that involve Mazgan and Tovin and people I prolly don’t know yet. There are waaay too many sneaky shenanigans for me to cover in my review but trust me when I say it’s tricky and sometimes gruesome and all rather brill.
 
 
TWW is some serious paranormal writing about different werewolves living beside each other and humans. They don’t like each other and they see humans as a resource but resources only stretch so far if you set bloodthirsty wolves and vamps on them. IDK how that will all play out but count me in. Garvey jumps around the edges of Teflondifferent packs because he has contempt for pretty much everyone and that suits certain pack members right now. He’s a Moondog which is a werewolf but not high up the order. He’s also Mr. Teflon, nothing sticks to him because he knows how to push just enough to get a rise and then back off so he doesn’t get killed. He’s also got buckets of street smarts and is useful. He’s outrageously lame and funny unless you’re the butt of his jokes, like Tovin is, then it’s kind of unfunny. Poor Tovin just wanted to be spontaneous and interesting because his on and off again bf has pushed him to that I’ll prove him wrong point. He’s got adventure pamphlets like parasailing and spelunking. I went spelunking 4 weeks ago and if you knew me you’d be laughing for days but I did it. I felt great but this whole book is like spelunking on speed for Tovin.
Me to Tovin: You are so much better than your ex because I’d say Marshall or Mitchell, or whatever his douchey name is, would have pissed his pants but you’re faking it till you make it.Tovin IS adorable, Garvey and I agree about that. I asked last review if I could three way with the mcs, am I too obvious if I ask again? Yes? No? Who cares?
 
 
 
 
Outside of Pat Robertson’s blog, if he has one, this has to be the worst blog in the whole world to review this book on, kinda apropos, because Jay’s a perv and I’m sweet cheeks and between us it seems out of place, but when I don’t have my head stuck in text books I read lots of non romance para and fantasy~ ooo, the truth is out there.  If I tell you it’s good paranormal werewolf GIF WEREWOLF SNARLreading, will you take Cocky Reviews and my word? It has queer characters, always good for us queerlings, it’s a bit intense with complications that make it interesting and stretch the grey matter. Garvey’s sexy stuff but he’s too busy being a brat to Tovin, also with semi world domination vamp plans, to actually do anything really sexy. Lovario’s got the whole wise shtick going on. The book gets harsh too so be prepped for that, there will be blood and cranium contortion. There’s a ghost in a blue dress and a bunch of crazy weird happenings nearer the end, and be scared of twenty somethings with the Dewey Decimal System.  I have a feeling the next book will unlock some powerfully good and bad para juju. I’m hoping maybe Garvey will be a teensy bit busy with his sweet treat too, he’s totally into him. I have this gooey spot for pet names and Garvey calling Tovin Sweet Treat is fab, he’d still be a smartass but the name was so melty on his lips when he said it~ “Sweet treat is adorable. Look at him with his big green eyes and blondish-brown hair. Oats and honey.” And this was a promise, a creepy one but I was clapping like Nicole Kidman at the Oscars~ “We’re going to finish this someday, sweet treat. Unless you die. Try not to die.”
.
GIF NICOLE KIDMAN CLAPPING
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For now, Garvey twirled the glasses frames in one paw and did something he rarely did. He thought about consequences. He didn’t want Tovin to die. He liked this dopey kid. It was an odd, unexpected realization. Clueless as Tovin was, there was something sweet about him that Garvey wanted to keep in the world. It tugged at a part of his heart he didn’t know existed.

.
Aww, Garvey has a heart, you wouldn’t know it but he does. ^^
.
GIF PUPPY ROLLING
 
After the first book in the Immutable Moon series I’m in! This book’s got laughs, it’s got lots of characters I like, there’s some nasty parts because it’s written how werewolves would behave if they were real, and pack means a group and whenever you have a group you have politicking. I’ll also reread it to find new stuff I missed this time so The Worst Werewolf gets an A for Awesome or 5 stars.
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review 2017-02-03 00:57
ARC Review: The Worst Best Man by MJ O'Shea
The Worst Best Man (Dreamspinner Press Book 27) - M.J. O'Shea

In this latest installment of the Dreamspun Desires series, we are introduced to August O'Leary, an American who went to college in the UK, fell deeply in love, got engaged, got dumped, and now, eight years later, works as a high-end event planner in London. He's got great friends, but hasn't allowed anyone to get close to him since his fiance broke off their engagement at the behest of the fiance's class-conscious mother.

You see, in Britain, one mustn't marry someone from the working class when one is filthy rich and part of the lower aristocracy. Apparently.

Since the ex-fiance, Christopher Burke, is the best friend of Libby, the bride-to-be who just hired August to plan her wedding which is the social event of the year, and Libby's fiance Edward is too busy to help with the planning, their paths cross once more.

I really liked that the author turned the usual "wedding planner" trope a bit on its head by not having her character fall for one of the happy couple, but the best friend of the bride, and gave them a strong albeit painful history. It's part second-chance-at-love story, and part tongue-in-cheek at the British social classes.

It's quite obvious from the start that August is still hurt and angry at being so unceremoniously dumped, and Christopher's inability to even apologize doesn't win him any favors either. It's clear that their love still burns brightly, but August doesn't trust Christopher at all, and Christopher has no idea how to win August back.

His persistence however pays off, and he gets another chance with August. Until he .... well, I'll let you experience that for yourself.

I liked August quite a lot, and I thought that he had the required backbone to stand up to Christopher, but also soft enough to allow himself to open up again after a while. I also liked his friends, and how supportive they were of him. August's family, whom we meet when he's back on Boston on vacation, was also supportive and kind.

I didn't like Christopher very much in the beginning, considering the history between him and August, but it was also clear after a while that he truly regretted having succumbed to his family's pressure to give up August, and is hellbent on winning him back, glad to be given another chance. I think that being given insight into Christopher's mind was helpful in turning my opinion of him the further I got into the book.

Of course, this book is OTT more often than not, but that's to be expected from this series, and part of why I love reading these books. The grand gesture, the sweeping romance, the heart-pounding lead-up to the climax - all of it is in here, and I had a blast reading this book.

One big niggle - when August and Will are moving to New York to open the new store, there is no mention of Will needing a visa to work in the US - while August as an American doesn't need this, Will as a Brit certainly does, and this was never mentioned. I cannot ascertain whether the author paid attention to immigration laws or not, or whether I was simply supposed to assume that a visa was obtained, so this bothered me.

Apart from that niggle though, I thought the book was a great way to spend a few hours, and I thoroughly enjoyed it.


** I received a free copy of this book from its publisher. A positive review was not promised in return. **

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review 2016-09-08 00:03
Zero stars.
Zero Day - David Baldacci

Red.
Poorly written.
Cliche-filled.

This is a book. It is a book with a red cover. It is written in short sentences. Like this. That is supposed to make the reader feel like things are happening. I guess.

This book is about a man, John Puller. I will call him Puller. Always. Puller is in the Army. He's just a man. In the army. Where he belongs. He investigates things. Like a badass. Sometimes, he saves people's lives. Except when he fails. He remembers combat. Sleeps. Lightly. M11 in his hand. Three seconds to wake and shoot. He has many medals. Medals are not important to Puller but they impress people who are impressed by such things. Superficial people who are impressed by superficial things.

In West Virginia, things are polluted. Water. It's black. There are rich men. They get rich from mining things. They own everything, and they sleep with beautiful women. The people are poor. Sometimes they are desperate. They make drugs. In the basement. There is a bunker. This might be important.

Puller goes places. He goes there for one purpose. That purpose is not making friends. He gets there early for one purpose. To find people first. Before they find him. He doesn't like being found.

Seven dead bodies. They stink of death. Puller showers. He wants to wash away the stink of death. The stink of death sticks to him. Like glue. He cleans out the cat box and is suddenly hungry. Food will have to suffice. For now. Whatever that even means.

Puller is tough. He is the toughest guy of all the tough guys. This is his book. Fuck this book.

 

********************************


This is one of the worst books I have ever read. It is cliched, the writing is wooden, the plot is silly, John Puller is a Gary Stu, and the entire thing is a giant wish-fulfillment for men who think that if they only had a gun and some military training, they too would be invincible. If this is a serious representation of David Baldacci's writing, I have no idea how he ever got a Big 5 contract.

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review 2016-08-29 06:13
The Best Part of Me (McKenna Series Book 1) - Jamie Hollins

I had a really hard time with this book. When a book takes place right where I live I have extremely high expectations. I always love reading a book when it takes place in Boston or one of the surrounding towns. Now, if you're not from Boston & you're not familiar with the surrounding towns, the landmarks or even how the towns communities are, then you won't have an issue with what I have issues with. If you're from Boston or one of the towns right outside (especially south of Boston), you may have issues like I did.

Issue 1: the author mentioned that Ewan, the books 'hero' was raised in Ballagh (we'll talk about that town in a bit) since age 9, which is a town right next to Boston. The author mentioned that Ewan talks with an Irish brogue accent. Shouldn't he have a Boston accent if that's where he grew up?

Issue 2: The name of the town. That's what really irked me throughout this whole book. The town Ballagh was a spitting image of another town named Quincy. The author used the proper names of other surrounding towns & landmarks. Why did she change the name of the town this book takes place in? I actually googled the name of the town & it is a real town...in Ireland. Ballagh is a predominantly Irish community & Ewan runs an Irish pub there. The real town Ballagh is copied after is also a predominantly Irish community town with lots of Irish pubs (I've been to a few of them). I just don't understand why the author kept everything else the same but changed the name of the town.

Issue3: I wasn't a huge fan of the characters. I thought they were one dimensional & flat. Ewan used to be an enforcer for some mob family but, he's not alpha at all. There was really nothing to him. Same with Quinn the 'heroine.' I found her to be slightly boring. There wasn't really anything to her. Yeah she had a huge family tragedy but, that was almost glossed over.

This book had so much potential to be wicked awesome. Especially Ewan. He could've been this big, bad, alpha dominant male but sadly, he was just sad. I skimmed a lot of this book & skimmed over the sex. Why? Because it wasn't hot or sexy. Like I said this book was a struggle to get through. The storyline was boring as was the characters.

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