Everything Changes by Melanie Hansen

Cover Created by : Natasha Snow

Release Date: September 14, 2020

 

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A childhood in foster care taught Carey Everett to hold tight to what he has. Enlisting in the Marines gave him purpose, but a life-threatening injury ended his career—and took his leg. Now fully recovered, Carey’s happier than he’s ever been. He has a fulfilling job, a chosen family and, best of all, a cherished friendship with Jase DeSantis, the platoon medic who saved his life.

 

Jase knows how to take care of the people he loves. As the oldest of seven, and then a Navy corpsman, it’s what he was born to do. Still, he’s haunted by his actions overseas. Playing music with his band keeps the demons at bay, but it’s a battle he’s starting to lose.

 

After a week of sun and fun in San Diego, Jase and Carey’s connection takes an unexpected turn. With change comes a new set of challenges. For Jase, it means letting someone else into his deepest pain. For Carey, it’s realizing love doesn’t always equal loss. In order to make their relationship work, they’ll each have to come to terms with their pasts…

 

…or risk walking away from each other for good.

 

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My review contains spoilers and they're mostly my thoughts...

Resilient Love, book 7 of Ramona Flightner’s epic Banished Saga, is quite aptly titled as we find our favorite characters going through ups and downs like any normal couple will, weathering incidents bound to test their love for each-other. This is one of the more unique attributes of this Saga, that the story of a couple isn’t finished with the HEA. As we find new things to appreciate in this series, the Saga continues as it should showcasing their lives with all its glory, as well as its difficulties.

The Banished Saga, when it began, was onset of suffragist movement of Boston 1901. Along the way we met many characters, including our favorite, the first couple of the series Clarissa and Gabriel in Banished Love. Their story was ongoing in books 2 and 3, Reclaimed Love and Undaunted Love. They still make appearances in the latest installments. We also met Clarissa and Gabriel’s family. Clarissa’s own brothers Colin, and Patrick who wasn’t introduced until much later. Her cousin Savannah and best friend Florence, both avid suffragettes and worked with Clarissa throughout. Gabriel’s younger brothers Richard and Jeremy were also introduced, as was their long lost uncle Aidan.

I don't think I've ever read a book where a couple deserved a 'happily ever after' more. "Unquiet" is the third book in Melanie Hansen's 'Resilient Love' series and I've enjoyed each of these stories so very much but this one...damn, it seriously broke my heart. It's one of the few books where I can honestly say I think I spent at least as much time crying as not. Sometimes it was happy tears...othertimes not so much.

 

We first met Loren in 'Signs of Life' book #2 in this series. He's the former boyfriend of Kai, who was one of the MCs in that story and while he and Kai are very good friends who still care for each other a lot. What they share is a strong and secure friendship and they've each moved in. Kai's story was in 'Signs of Life' and at the end of it we were given the indication that Loren was going to go after the man who held his heart. 

 

Loren and Elliot have been friends all their lives and they've loved each other that long. Unfortunately love's course is never easy and when one of the people involved is a cop and the other deals with mental health issues...you see Elliot is bipolar...if you're not familiar with this condition...take a minute before reading this book and remember google is your friend. I was fortunate in that because I've worked in health care for over 15 years, during that time I had the experience of working with several clients who were bipolar and the one thing I know from that experience is that it takes an incredibly strong person to be the partner of someone who's bipolar and it takes an even stronger person to not just survive being bipolar but to thrive, to make a good and productive life for themselves and that's what Elliot wants but it's not easy. It's so far from easy there aren't even words.

 

There's no perfection between these men they both make mistakes such huge mistakes but it's never done with the intent to hurt the other person. Loren struggles to be the supportive partner that Elliot needs while still trying to pursue his career goals as a police officer. Elliot fights so hard to manage his condition and be what Lauren needs...they both stumble and have to find ways to pick themselves back up and put themselves and their relationship back together...it's heartbreaking, gut wrenching and seriously if you can read this book without shedding any tears, without feeling their pain...well, you're a tougher person than I.

 

I had times when I was frustrated with Loren and Elliot but honestly never was there a point at which I didn't want them to find a way to be together. Melanie Hansen has created two incredibly amazing men in this story...not perfect but strong, resilient men who were willing to do what it took...anything it took to be together because when you love someone whose bipolar..."You're either all in or all out."

 

All of this was made even more vivid for me with the addition of Michael Stellman's voice narrating this story. He gave such depth and emotion to these men and to the people in their lives allowing me to connect with the story on an emotional level that I'm not sure I would have felt had I just been reading the book. I'm not saying I wouldn't have still loved this book no I think it's more a case of Michael Stellman took a book that I would have loved regardless and simply made it that much better.

 

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An audio book of "Unquiet" was graciously provided by the publisher in exchange for an honest review.

Review to come

3,5 stars

So yeah...it just dawned on me that I never rated or reviewed this.  I am still not sure where I stand with this book at all.  It is absolutely beautifully written but my gawd...I honestly need my own therapy sessions now to deal with this book.  It is a gut buster!!  Read over the course of almost 2 weeks, I could honestly not take more than a few chapters at a time.  Sobbing to the point of exhaustion.  Does this make for a fun read...really it doesn't and on top of that I am not sure I would call this a HEA book in the sense of "Happily Ever After" but more "Hope for Ever After".

So where the hell to land??  I guess I will land at 3.5 as this really lands in the middle of 2 and 5 for me.  LOL...yeah I am still in a funk.  Oh well.  

If you have read the other two books in the series then you really should dive into this too but I will warn you...it is not a fun journey.  Grab plenty of kleenex and a bottle of your favorite alcoholic beverage...you will need it.  Melanie Hansen holds nothing back.

Other Books in this series (Note that both of these made it on my Best of 2015 list of MM Reads):

Everything Changes (Review)

Signs of Life (Review)

Reading Updates:

1%

Teri and I did good to wait as long as we did. *grabby hands*:D

2%

What the hell??? 4 pages in and Melanie has done it to me again!! Sweet Sweet Boys.


12%

“Why does the moon mean so much to you, Eliot?”
Eliot didn’t reply, and Loren rolled his head along the wall to look at him.
“El?”
There was silence for a long time, and then Eliot murmured, his voice barely audible, “It’s always there somewhere. Whether it’s cloudy, whether it’s sunny— it’s there, even if you can’t see it. The sun goes away, but the moon is always there.” Eliot turned his head and looked into Loren’s eyes. “You’re my moon too, Loren. You’re like my— like my gravity. You keep me here when sometimes I just want to— go away.”

19%

Sweet Jesus...there is no doubt this will be amazing but my god, I'm going to need help coping with this read.


21%


Please let this be real.
He opened his eyes and the man was still there.
"Loren?” he whispered again, his voice tentative. The man didn’t answer, just opened his arms, and Eliot stepped into them, the years melting away as Loren gathered him close.

26%

“God, you’re so beautiful,” Loren breathed, bringing one hand up to cup Eliot’s cheek. “The face that’s haunted my dreams.” He let his thumb stroke along Eliot’s cheekbone as he looked at him, cataloging the differences nine years had made.

It's clear. I need to just read this in the dead of night.

30%

All of his purchases were thrown into a corner, and he kicked at the boxes of pots and pans. Maybe he’d want to cook again one day, but really, why bother? No one liked him; he was just a crazy asshole no one wanted to be around. He was worthless, so why would he expect anyone to care if he lived or died, much less want to come over and eat with him?

38%

He banged out of his apartment and went to the nearest bus stop, pacing in front of the little enclosed bench thing. After a few minutes, the bus approached in a cloud of exhaust, and for one second Eliot considered throwing himself in front of it. Some fucking asshole was standing right where he’d need to be, though, if he was gonna get a good running start.

40%

They want to tie you down, make you piss yourself. And then they’ll laugh, the black demon whispered. Because you’re stupid and crazy and worthless. Eliot fought against the demon’s words, trying to stay still even as hands touched him, the pressure on his skin making him want to scream.
Just the most gut wrenching book. Gaaahhh :-(

47%

It was amazing and beautiful and special, and he felt closer to Eliot in that moment than he’d ever felt to any human being in his life. Eliot hadn’t come—hadn’t even been hard. It wasn’t important, Loren realized; what was important was what they shared together on that rumpled futon, something that went far beyond the simple act of sex, something that was an expression of feeling, of trust, the deepest form of communication two people could possibly have.
Loren finally understood what it was like to truly make love.

50%

Loren pulled Eliot into his lap, and wrapped him up in his arms. “I want to be with you because you’re you. Because you have the kindest heart of anyone I’ve ever known, and you’re strong and resilient in so many ways, ways that leave me in awe.” Eliot heaved a ragged sigh, and Loren whispered, “I want to be with you because I love you, plain and simple.

50%

At first glance he could give off the appearance of being a severe, unapproachable cold fish, but all Kai had to do was enter the room and Jeremy seemed to light up from within, cool gray eyes turning to molten silver. Then the man was breathtaking.
Gaaah this just makes me want to read Signs of Life again. ❤️❤️ Jeremy and Kai ❤️❤️

53%

The girl was in her twenties and horribly disfigured about the face and neck by burns. Eliot didn’t want to ask if she’d done it to herself, but considering the level of depression he’d observed in her, he wouldn’t be at all surprised. When you wanted the sweet relief of death, even the horror of the potential blood and agony involved in getting it didn’t deter you.

58%

Gaaaah this book is sooo hard.


63%

“You were always meant to be. Love, Mom.”
“She saw us, Loren, before we saw us,” Eliot said in a hushed voice.
❤️❤️❤️

65%

“You’ve always been with me, Loren, through my memories. Always.”


70%

Anxiety is high. I have a very bad feeling about all this.


76%

This last 5% has been rather aggravating.

80%

Loren knew something would have to change. This job was going to suck the life out of both of them. Besides the pressure of living a lie, Loren wasn’t there for Eliot like he wanted to be, like he’d planned to be. He didn’t know how much longer Eliot would put up with this, and after this case was over, there was going to be some soul searching, some reorganizing of dreams. They both deserved more, and no job on earth was worth losing Eliot over.
Finally!!! Jesus...


81%


Just kill me now.

100%