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text 2017-09-19 01:34
Reading progress update: I've read 137 out of 460 pages.
The Fifth Elephant (Discworld, #24) - Terry Pratchett

It may just be my mood, but this made me actually laugh out loud (conversation between the Patrician and Acting Captain Colon):

'I have here another complaint of over-enthusiastic clamping. I'm sure you know to what I refer.'

'It was causing serious traffic congestion, sah!'

'Quite so. It is well known for it. But it is, in fact, the opera house.'


'The owner feels that big yellow clamps at each corner detract from what I might call the tone of the building. And, of course, they do prevent him from driving it away.'

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text 2017-09-19 00:07
Reading progress update: I've read 119 out of 460 pages.
The Fifth Elephant (Discworld, #24) - Terry Pratchett

Carrot has enlisted Gaspode's help to track Angua. Gaspode is the flea-bitten talking wonder-dog that you may recall from earlier books.


From page 25:

'Do you know anything about this?' [Vetinari] said.

Vimes read, in large, round, crayoned letters:

'DeEr Cur, The CruELt to HOMLIss DoGs In thIs CITy Is A DIssGrays, WaT arE The WaTCH DoIng A BouT IT¿ SiNeD The LeAK AgyANsct CrUleT To DoGs.'

'Not a thing,' he said.

'My clerks say that one like it is pushed under the door most nights,' said the Patrician. 'Apparently no one is seen.'

From page 100:

A grubby cloth cap lay on the pavement. On the pavement beside the cap someone had written in damp chalk: Plese HelP This LiTTle doGGie.

Beside it sat a small dog.

It was not cut out by nature to be a friendly little waggy-tailed dog, but it was making the effort. Whenever someone walked by it sat up on its hind legs and whined pitifully.

Something landed in the cap. It was a washer.

The charitable pedestrian had gone only a few steps further along the road when he heard: 'And I hope your legs fall off, mister.'

And between Gaspode and Carrot on page 103:

'How do you manage to write, Gaspode?'

'I holds the chalk in me mouth. Easy.'

He's already a talking dog. You can't expect him to be able to spell too.

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review 2017-09-18 01:48
Carpe Jugulum by Terry Pratchett
Carpe Jugulum (Discworld, #23) - Terry Pratchett

Series: Discworld #23


King Verence invites vampires to his daughter's christening and they decide to take over the country. And these aren't your traditional vampires who fear daylight and garlic. They're modern vampyres (the spelling was their idea) who have overcome the ancient superstitions that have been holding them back. There are the Lancre witches to take into consideration, though. Agnes has sort of taken Magrat's place as most junior witch since Magrat's been focused on queening and motherhood.


This one had some great moments but I didn't quite love it even with an appearance by the Nac mac Feegle. I read this for the "Vampires" square for the Halloween Bingo. It could also fit "Witches" (obviously) and "Supernatural" squares. Perhaps "In the dark, dark, woods" too.


Previous updates:

402 of 425 pages

369 of 425 pages

314 of 425 pages

209 of 425 pages

52 of 425 pages

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text 2017-09-18 00:58
Reading progress update: I've read 402 out of 425 pages.
Carpe Jugulum (Discworld, #23) - Terry Pratchett

‘Really? And you think you can stand in my way? An axe isn’t even a holy symbol!’
‘Oh.’ Oats looked crestfallen. Agnes saw his shoulders sag as he lowered the blade.
Then he looked up, smiled brightly and said, ‘Let’s make it so.’
Agnes saw the blade leave a gold trail in the air as it swept around. There was a soft, almost silken sound.


I love that line: "Let's make it so."

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text 2017-09-18 00:20
Reading progress update: I've read 369 out of 425 pages.
Carpe Jugulum (Discworld, #23) - Terry Pratchett

Greebo takes out a vampire.


His coffin was in the centre of the dim cellar, its lid lying carelessly on the floor beside it. He’d always been messy with the bedclothes, even as a human.
Vargo climbed in, twisted and turned a few times to get comfortable on the pillow, then pulled the lid down and latched it.
As the eye of narrative drew back from the coffin on its stand, two things happened. One happened comparatively slowly, and this was Vargo’s realization that he never recalled the coffin having a pillow before.
The other was Greebo deciding that he was as mad as hell and wasn’t going to take it any more. He’d been shaken around in the wheely thing and then sat on by Nanny, and he was angry about that because he knew, in a dim, animal way, that scratching Nanny might be the single most stupid thing he could do in the whole world, since no one else was prepared to feed him. This hadn’t helped his temper.
Then he’d encountered a dog, which had tried to lick him. He’d scratched and bitten it a few times, but this had had no effect apart from encouraging it to try to be more friendly.
He’d finally found a comfy resting place and had curled up into a ball, and now someone was using him as a cushion
There wasn’t a great deal of noise. The coffin rocked a few times, and then pivoted around.
Greebo sheathed his claws and went back to sleep.

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